Ruffian
by TheRiotess
Summary: He vowed to protect his sensei’s unborn child. He promised he would no longer brush off his responsibilities. He said he couldn’t be a kid anymore. Now to prove this…
1. Chapter 1: Lifting the Burden

**Author's Note: **Forgive me for the weird format. This is about the fifth time I've tried to change it, and I'm still not pleased. This is my first time submitting, and Fanfiction is being a total female dog about this. I'll change it to the way I like when it isn't 3 o' clock in the morning.

**ALSO: **If you haven't read up to the current chapter of the manga, spoilers for you. You shouldn't continue. If you have, then have at it my friends.

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Ruffian

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Chapter 1: Lifting the Burden

The flooding rays of a gently rising sun beamed through the calm, misty morning. The colorful east facing buildings captured the first warm highlights of the day, and smoothly blanketed over the sleepy village. The early rising birds made their daily morning routines of trying to wake each other up. It seemed that everyone was still asleep. The sun had barely woken up, after all.

However, on the dusty flat terrain of a training arena, stood a strained, motionless figure. His hands were tightly clasped, his fingers intertwined with palms sweating. His knees were severely bent and wavering, and his breath wisped violently through his gritted teeth.

"45 minutes….new record…" whispered a seething voice through a tight grin. His breathing was harsh, and his eyes narrowed and twitched fiercely. He could hear the grinding of his clenched teeth and taste the sweat that seeped into the dry corners of his mouth. He cringed and spat, but he did not release his hands.

What held him so focused and still, lay several hundred feet before him. It was a bizarre sight. There were five thin protruding rock formations, like columns, each being only a few inches thick in diameter—but more than that, it was what rested upon each one that looked so strange and baffling. At the very tip of each column, supported a massive newly unearthed boulder. Each boulder had to weigh several tons. It was impossible for the thin, bony columns to be able to support their weight. However…tightly wrapped around the quaking, teetering stones, were long, flat, broad strands of blackness. Undoubtedly, they were shadows, seemingly come to life. It appeared as though they were the only things holding the trembling boulders up, and keeping them from crushing the comparatively pencil thin columns beneath.

The broadest shadow itself seemed fatigued, as it quivered between the boulders and its tall user. Sweat broke erratically from his face. His parched breathing turned to panting. Every second rattled his bones harder. Anything was better than this. He was about to break down.

"Shikamaru, that's enough," came the authoritative voice of his father. He stood over a gated ledge that looked over the arena.

"Almost made it to 50…" came his son's answer. "Nearly 50 minutes—" his eyes suddenly shot up to his father, "Can you hold the shadow possession for 50 minutes? Almost a whole hour. My goal is an hour by the end of this week…"

There was a brief silence.

"That's tomorrow…" Shikaku looked away slowly and calmly, pretending as though his goal was both unlikely as well as insignificant.

"Yeah? I'll do it…just gonna take a bit more sweat down my brow…" Shikamaru continued his concentration on the boulders, losing sight of his father.

Shikaku silently stared down at his son…his boy….

Shikamaru, the laziest, most lethargic ninja and son to ever walk the earth, was showing a freakish display of purpose and drive. Sharpening the talents he was already blessed with was never apart of Shikamaru's grand scheme of things. He didn't even think he was as remarkable as everyone complimented him to be. He wanted to prove to the world that he was an average person, by accomplishing average things averagely, so that he could go about living an average life. In no way did he want to overexert himself, or exceed anyone's expectations. If Naruto wanted to scream and yell about becoming the greatest ninja and earning himself the title of Hokage, he could have it.

One would think that seeing Shikamaru finally apply himself; finally put his talent to his own use, finally use his own time to train instead of daydream—would actually put his father Shikaku at ease. Perhaps it should even make him feel proud... However, since this drastic change in his behavior, attitude and routine, Shikaku was anything but at ease. His son's change was abrupt and chaste. His absence from the house was constant. His training wasn't just hard work; it was merciless. Now, looking down at his son, Shikaku drew in a breath. It was almost frightening.

"Shikamaru, I said that's enough."

Shikamaru rasped through his teeth, "almost…"

The boulders were quaking violently. The pillars that clearly could not support their weight were shattering. The jutsu was finally starting to fail.

Shikamaru's snarled teeth and severely strained body suddenly released all tension at once. It was as if someone flicked the off switch in his body.

The young ninja gave out a single huff, and began falling forward. Shikaku suddenly appeared before him, gracefully grabbing him by the scruff of his collar, and held him roughly. He wasn't about to cradle the boy after two direct orders to stop. Shikamaru dangled limply, apparently unconscious. The five supported boulders crashed heavily to the earth.

"What good is it to break a self-imposed record if you're too exhausted to even attempt it?" Shikaku asked while holding him. Shikamaru's shadowed eyes didn't flinch, and his breathing was hampered. No answer came from him.

"Right…c'mon now." Shikaku grabbed the boy's arm, about to lift him to his feet—

Shikamaru's eyes snapped open and he wrenched his head up, clasping his hands together.

"Kage Nui!" he breathed fiercely.

Shikaku stopped spun around immediately. Sure enough, the Shadow Sewing technique was instantly activated.

Although the boulders had fallen, Shikamaru's shadows had never left them. And now, whip-like strands of black shadows suddenly pierced the boulders. All five stones crumbled to thousands of pieces to the ground.

"_Shika-MARU_!" Shikaku swiftly planted four huge knuckles into Shikamaru's stomach.

"Arck!" Shikamaru choked and gasped before crashing to the ground like the boulders before him.

Shikaku took a deep, exasperated breath and turned back to the ruble. The cloud of dust expanded and thinned out over the flat arena. Shikaku sighed and shook his head. Holding the shadow possession for an unheard of amount of time, which strained his network severally, only to finish it off with the shadow sewing technique was staggering.

How the kid managed to hold it for longer than fifteen minutes at his level was astonishing to Shikaku, but to see him use both techniques so strenuously for nearly an hour simply baffled him. Shikaku bent down and hoisted his son up.

--

Down in a large secluded woodland area, a gently sloping stone path led to a vast property, with numerous running creeks and a comfortable, cool atmosphere that picked up off the cold water. The broad house that settled in the middle of it all was a peaceable looking manor, which connected directly to the forest. Here, Shikaku carefully dragged his son to its front.

Just as he made it into the house, the heavy creaking of his feet, and the dragging of another hefty pair brought Yoshino out from the kitchen.

She stopped abruptly, eyes darting over her battered son.

"What happened?"

"Self induced training mishap," Shikaku answered with a calm smile, "don't worry. He just needs some sleep… Lord, I didn't think I'd ever say that…" he grumbled.

Yoshino sighed with an uneasy smile as her husband disappeared down the hall. He came back scratching the back of his head, refusing eye contact with his wife. Yoshino noticed this and stepped back into the kitchen. Shikaku followed.

"Boy's gettin' big…" Shikaku smiled gruffly, " 'bout as tall as me now."

Yoshino silently poured both of them tea.

"Watch, pretty soon he'll get as big as Asuma and grow a beard, ha ha!"

"He better not!"

Shikaku looked at her cautiously.

"I already have to deal with your silly goatee," she carped, "Shikamaru's gotta fine face. He doesn't need to cover it up with fur."

Shikaku snickered, "Well, I was just comparing the two. I'll be quick to make sure he shaves..."

He looked back up at her with more seriousness. He knew there was more to her response. It came out too quickly, too sharply—even for her. Sure enough, she went on.

"I understand Shikamaru's going through a tough time about Asuma and all…I expected his behavior would change a bit, but this is just…drastic. I feel ridiculous for worrying, but all the same it feels so strange…"

"I understand…" Shikaku stood up and drew closer to her, "for some reason, I'm not exactly surprised, though he remains frustratingly unpredictable. It'll take awhile for him to cool down…"

His eyes drifted downward.

"You know, Asuma was the only one that prompted his training. Shikamaru always slacked off and slept unless Asuma was there to command him around. Even _I_ didn't force training on him unless I was teaching him something new. And he always learned new techniques so easily…so I let Asuma take care of everything…"

Shikaku closed his eyes. "Now that Asuma's gone…I think the poor boy's freaking out a bit. No matter how cool and calm he acts, no matter how stone faced he can be— which compliments him as a great ninja by the way— he still wakes up every morning, knowing he's not gonna see his sensei…knowing he's got no one to play shougi with."

Yoshino looked at him quickly.

"Doesn't he play with you?"

"He never asks…" Shikaku smiled forlornly. "I have to go up to him and ask if I can play; then he'll play with me. Other than that, he never asks me…he plays alone…"

Yoshino sighed, and her gaze wandered to the window.

"He's been gone a lot lately…" she looked up at Shikaku, "I know when he get's missions. I'm so use to him lounging about and sleeping wherever when he has a break, but now, he's almost never here."

"Well…" Shikaku didn't want to attribute this to anything.

"You can't defend him," Yoshino said quickly, "it's been three months since Asuma's passing, and he hasn't had a single mission on Tsunade's order. Where on earth does he go? He can't be training _all_ the time. For goodness sake, not even Rock Lee can do that."

Shikaku breathed through his nose and stared down the hall for a while. His vision slowly drifted about, never focusing on anything particular. Then, his eyes suddenly widened, and he jolted from his seat, standing abruptly.

"What's wrong?"

Before Yoshino could get a response, Shikaku ran down the hallway and burst through Shikamaru's door.

"Ha… huh…" he gave a pathetic laugh. Yoshino followed quickly and paused at the sight.

Shikamaru was gone.

_-In a secluded region of the village-_

"Have you gotten the reports of the present Genin who passed and are entering the exam from their sensei's?" asked a young, dark haired woman, oddly enough, with a pig walking at her side.

"Yep, and I already gave out all approvals and disapprovals to the requests. We'll be having a meeting in a few hours," replied a near equally young looking blonde woman, though her voice sounded suspiciously older.

"You mean you already finished?"

"Yep. It sure pays off to do quick, sloppy work."

"What? Tsunade-sama!"

"I'm just kidding Shizune. Take a joke, huh? Not even _I'm_ that irresponsible…"

Shizune stared skeptically.

'I wouldn't be so sure…' she mumbled in her head.

"I finished quickly so I could take a bit of a break, you know? What with all this nonsense with Akatsuki and the decision to go on with the exams anyway— it takes my breath away, and all I'm doing is sitting on my ass at a desk."

"I understand," Shizune giggled with sympathy. Their heels clopped hollowly over a wooden bridge mounted above a meager river.

"You deserve a good walk at the very least." She smiled. "Ton ton could use the exercise too…"

The little pink pig snorted at her with contempt. Just then though, it stopped short of fully crossing the bridge, and stared onward.

"What the matter?" asked Shizune. Tsunade too stopped but glanced upward.

Several yards away, a tall young ninja leapt from the trees and landed before them. He stood and gave a quick acknowledging bow before facing Tsunade specifically.

"Shikamaru…what a surprise…" Tsunade walked up and stopped a few feet from him.

"This doesn't feel like a random event. You look expectant."

Shikamaru lowered his head slightly.

"Lady Tsunade…I wish to continue my services as a shinobi and accept missions again."

He got straight to the point.

"I appreciate you privileging me specifically with this hiatus, even more so than my former teammates…but I'm ready to become active again."

Tsunade stared. She then turned to her assistant with a skewed smile.

"Am I hearing this right, Shizune? Shikamaru is actually asking for work? He's actually requesting activities that will inevitably restrict the time he has to watch clouds? Are you low on money or something?"

Shikamaru smirked. "No, I'm quite frugal, and I don't waste money shamelessly like you, Jiraiya or Naruto."

Tsunade frowned slightly, but was not greatly offended by the truth.

"I also appreciate you allowing me to take care of Kurenai…"

Tsunade's eyes softened, and grew more serious.

"She's due in a few months isn't she? Did you hear? It's gonna be a boy."

Tsunade and Shizune exchanged sympathetic glances.

"That's quite a responsibility you're taking up, Shikamaru. I'm very pleased and proud that you're keeping it up so strongly," Tsunade praised.

"So will you reinstate me on active duty?" Shikamaru reverted to his first subject.

"I'll start you off easy so you can get back into the groove of things. Though I know it won't take you long to readapt. But before I do, come to my office. There's something I want to speak with you about."

Tsunade sat at her desk and quickly rested her chin on her intertwined fingers.

"I've got a few C and B rank missions I think you can nail easily. You've been on more A and S rank missions than any other Chunnin, and even though you never seemed to take _any_ mission seriously, you always completed them flawlessly and came back relatively unscathed. I've never met a ninja, even at your age, who hasn't been in critical condition at least once in his life, and yet you managed to avoid such great harm while doing two or three times as many missions—_dangerous_ missions to be exact, as they have.

"I intentionally placed a Chunnin in such advanced missions simply because I knew how capable and talented you, Shikamaru, as and individual really is. Despite being a Chunnin, you exhibit all the qualities of the most elite Jounin, and I treated you as such, with only your immaturity as a hindrance to your advancement."

Shikamaru had a feeling of what was to come, and he wasn't really sure of how to feel about it. He was growing somewhat fatigued just listening to her, but he managed to stop his eye from twitching.

"But…" She closed her eyes, "I see that immaturity is vanishing rapidly. I think its time you hold a rank that finally suits you."

Shikamaru widened his eyes and opened his mouth slightly.

"If defeating an Akatsuki member by yourself, and knowingly aiding in the defeat of another doesn't get you promoted to Jounin, I don't know what will." She lifted her head with a smile, "Adding to your exceptional success record for completing missions, I say you deserve this promotion."

"Lady Tsunade…you're…"

"That's right Shikamaru, you're a Jounin now."

_-The Nara Residence 3:32 noon-_

The sun had passed its highest and hottest peak in the day, and was now slowly gravitating to the horizon; splashing its vibrant western rays over the bustling village. Back in the quiet seclusion of the Nara household, Shikamaru swiftly climbed through his window and entered his bedroom.

Without any hesitation or uncertainty, he opened up his closet, grabbed a large bag and threw it on the bed. He then grabbed several articles of clothing, a backpack and books, and set them on the bed as well. He heard footsteps drawing near, but for the most part, he went about his business.

The door swung open, and the comparatively light footsteps indicated that it was his mother. Still, he paid no heed.

"Where've you been?" Yoshino asked quietly.

"Out."

Yoshino drew her head back at the abrupt answer.

"Where, Shikamaru?"

Shikamaru stood up and faced her.

"What's the matter mom? Something bothering you?" he asked neutrally.

"I have the same question, Shikamaru…" she replied softly.

"Asuma's dead. Of course it bothers me." He turned back around and knelt down over his bed again.

Yoshino was stunned silent. Though there was nothing bitter or harsh in his tone, his bluntness on the sensitive matter was disturbing.

"It's all right mom, don't worry about it." His assurance seemed to come at the right time, though it did little to appease her. Yoshino waited for him to follow through.

"I know it must look like I'm going insane to you and dad, but I've had a lot on my mind lately, and it isn't all about Asuma," he turned to her again, "it's also about his child, my teammates, and my other friends. It's a lot of things. Training's just one part of a whole. It doesn't consume me, and neither does anything else. I'm trying to make due with this break Tsunade's given me, that's all."

If Yoshino didn't know any better, she would think his answer was well rehearsed and thought over, maybe even written down and memorized. However, she knew her son all his life; and she was very aware of how well he could answer a question. She remained quiet as he continued…packing?

"What are you doing?" she asked, tilting her head, completely oblivious to the scene.

"Moving out."

Yoshino's knees suddenly buckled, and she seemed to stumble in place.

"Wha—what?" she stammered.

"Yup." He zipped up the bag and stood, "I'll be making a few trips back and forth to get my stuff, but I won't be taking everything, obviously."

Yoshino didn't know what to say. This was ridiculous. It was absurd. This was happening too quickly. What on earth was wrong with him? What had happened to her lazy fawn she gave such tough love to?

"So…" she finally figured it out, "that's why you've been gone so often. You've been scoping out a new nest…"

Shikamaru lowered his head slightly.

"Wh…why? Why are you leaving?" she was breathless now.

"C'mon mom, I'm not leaving the village—"

"It's not just that!" she snapped, "it's…it's everything at once. It's all of this. Ever since Asuma—"

"I already told you…" he interrupted sternly. He didn't want this to turn into an over complicated, physiologically imposing argument of heedless emotional analyzing. He hated those kinds of arguments, or any kind of pseudo answer as to what a person might be feeling on any given circumstance because of some, "bad experience." He knew humans were just too complex for appropriate words.

"I already told you…" he repeated more gently, "now you just have to get use to the answer…" He turned away, "Kinda like how I did…."

Yoshino looked up at him.

He was tall… and still growing. His shoulders broadened and his muscles were continuously filling out the still perceptible gaps made by his big lanky joints. He looked so much more like a man than a boy— but the charming childishness till subtly flickered in his lazy eyes, and his face had yet to harden from the outer elements, and the inner turmoil. Yoshino could feel her eyes tightening and her jaw clenching, but she fought back any evidence of tears.

"Look, I'm just moving to an apartment complex a little over a mile down. I picked a specific place closest to the forest so I can tend to my assigned portion of the herd. Plus, my path crosses with dad's… so there's always a chance I'll meet up with him if he needs any help. And I'll come over on the weekends, 'cause I can clearly see you think I'm moving out of the country or something."

Yoshino wiped away the now streaming tears.

"You see? I have it all planned out," he assured.

Yoshino silently let a smile come over her. She knew Shikaku would look at this as further growth for him.

"You're going to be by yourself now…you have to be careful when training. You can't just train till you drop dead."

"I know…I got carried away. I'll be more careful."

It seemed rather awkward, but he knew it would be right to surprise her with a hug. His mother would often smother him with bear hugs and kisses before, after, and sometimes during her tantrums. Her anger could be quickly ignited, but she could forgive in seconds and become that sweet neighbor lady next door. She seemed to have no ability to hold a grudge.

Shikamaru was never one to initiate affection to anyone, though he tolerated it as long as it allowed him to breath. He looked up and reached out to her. Yoshino lifted her head and curled her fingers. Shikamaru knew what to expect next, as he slowly wrapped his arms around her. Yoshino stared forward, her stinging vision blurring as they welled up.

"Easy mom, take it easy…"

She rested her head on his shoulder and took a deep breath.

"I'm busy this weekend, but I'll see you and dad next week, all right? Then I'll get the rest of my stuff."

Yoshino released him and smiled with her head down.

"I was never prepared to think you would leave so soon. I thought you would at least come of age first…but…you're grown up mentally than most your age…and I know this will be nothing for you. It's me that needs to get use to this transition…"

Shikamaru hoisted the bag over his shoulder.

"I already said bye to dad before his mission, so don't get mad at him since he knew before you."

Yoshino silently nodded.

"I'll see ya, mom." He kissed her cheek and walked out of the room. He left the door open, and the long pauses between his footsteps from his large strides, quietly faded down the hall. Yoshino heard a second door open and shut, before nothing but silence hovered in the air.

_3 weeks later…_

If flocks of sand ever had an existence, they certainly prevailed in the vast regions of Suna. It was hard to believe that any life existed, let alone thrived in the merciless desert trap. However, even if the desert wasn't a violent wave of gritty shards of gravel, one would never know of the hidden, mud layered village, protectively surrounded by high, jagged cliffs. Though even this place was not entirely sheltered from the versatile, snake-like strands of sand that whipped through the streets of the village.

All of these redundant happenings were completely irrelevant in the minds of two ninja walking side by side within the largest, most dominant building in the village.

"Well I still think it's kind of unnerving that we're still going to continue with the Chunnin exams…"

"Wow Kankuro, 'unnerving' is a big word for you," Temari jeered.

"Hey, shut up!"

"Just give it a rest about the Chunnin exams will you?" Temari sighed with a kind of tired frustration, as though this had been discussed and argued about before, "I wouldn't have it any other way. We need to test their skills and promote the ones that deserve it. The last thing this, or any other village needs is to be overrun with Genin," Temari argued with sufficient astuteness.

"Gaara, the Hokage, and both village's elders agreed that it would be wise to continue with the exam despite Akatsuki's interference. Besides, Konoha has been doing an amazing job with getting rid of them. Whatever threat they posses, it isn't around here, that's for sure."

Kankuro said nothing, but his cranky face could be understood in any language.

"Even so, I don't like the idea of you going off for three days by yourself…" he pouted as manly as possible.

"What? I can't believe you didn't hear me screaming—I mean…_debating _with Gaara about that." She walked on silently for a moment. "I've got an escort this time. No matter how hard I try, I can't travel to Konoha by myself like I use to. Now I've got to keep an eye on some lame ninja that's suppose to keep an eye on me."

"Hey, c'mon, our ninja aren't that bad. And I'm sure Gaara picked the most suitable one."

"The ninja won't be from here. There a couple from Konoha, obviously."

Kankuro lifted a brow. "Really? Oh…well…I'm sure we can trust the Hokage to pick some suitable ones…"

Temari breathed with exasperation through her nose, and walked onward toward the double door exit. Just then Gaara stepped into vision from the stairwell.

"Hey Gaara, come to say goodbye?" She asked, in a much more civil tone than when she had talked with him earlier.

"Just a temporary farewell I suppose," he answered softly as the doors were opened for them.

The sand gently danced around their legs as the three headed toward the outside entrance, subtly masked by the wild spurts of floating desert.

As Temari mentally prepared her mind for this simple, yet very time-consuming mission ahead of her, she noticed a lone figure silhouetted against the blurry, scared atmosphere. He stood relaxed, completely at ease, though there was something intimidating about his silence. His shoulders jetted out from his body, yet there was a lankiness about his tall stature that easily told that he was not yet fully-grown, and youth still had a strong grip.

As the dark distorted colors of his clothing became more discerning amongst the murky air, Temari's eyes widened as she instantly recognized his face. His eyes were droopy, slightly fatigued, but very sharp. The right corner of his upper lip lifted slightly in a subtle, wry smile that looked roguish, yet calm and peaceable at the same time—the kind of smile Shikamaru, and only Shikamaru could pull off.

"W—ell…"

Temari lifted a brow to her own stuttering.

"Hey…" came the confident, slightly parched voice.

"Well, well, Shikamaru," she recomposed herself as a playful smile came across her lips. "Looks like you finally became a Jounin. I can't believe how quickly you accomplished my suggestion." She placed her hands on her hips.

"How do you know he's a Jounin?" Kankuro asked. He was very unaware of Gaara's dealings with Temari's escort.

"Because _only_ a Jounin can escort me from the village," she answered.

She took a step closer to Shikamaru, entering into very close proximity. Shikamaru instinctively stood straighter and looked down at her with growing uncertainty. He flinched when her hand came hovering to his head.

"You got taller," she stated bluntly. "You've gotta stop doing that," she ordered teasingly.

"Right…I'll have a discussion with my hormones about that one," Shikamaru replied candidly.

Temari snickered quietly and looked to her brothers; the shorter, looking sober and tranquil, while the taller, looking significantly peeved. Temari pretended to ignore this as she turned to a quiet Shikamaru again.

Kankuro had narrowed eyes, a wrinkled nose, and screwed up looking lips; but he seemed to have no idea of how obvious his expression was.

"Why is there only one?" finally spoke Gaara. "I believe I asked for two escorts."

Shikamaru looked to him and bowed slightly.

"Apologies for last minute changes, Kazekage-sama. Originally, there was me, and another shinobi. However, halfway through the journey, we received a hawk. The message stated that my partner was needed in a joint mission pertaining to evidence gathering on a site where there has been major movement from Akatsuki. I was deemed more capable than him, so I remain as an escort, since his specialty lies in forensics anyway. I hope you understand. It was better than both of us not coming at all."

"I understand. At least we got the stronger of the two. I don't want Temari traveling alone. No ninja traveling a distance over a day is to leave without an escort at this time."

"Perfectly understandable."

Kankuro, unbeknownst to himself, still had the stink face.

"Anyways," Shikamaru continued more casually now, "it'll be fine. We'll watch each others backs."

Temari glanced up at him, seeing his eyes fixed on her. For whatever reason, she found herself looking away.

Gaara lowered his head and nodded. Kankuro's extreme expression grew more fatigued, but it was still plastered.

"Right…so I'll see you guys in a few months," Temari waved and turned. Shikamaru lingered behind for a moment. He bowed one last time.

"I'll make sure she makes it to Konoha safely," he assured.

"Have a safe journey," Gaara replied placidly.

Shikamaru nodded and followed Temari's footsteps. Temari waited for him as he came running towards her. She instinctively picked up her pace and matched his as he came to her side.

Gaara turned away and headed back toward the tower. Kankuro remained facing the village entrance, staring out until the two disappeared behind a wall of hurling sand. Finally, he turned his back and caught up with Gaara.

"…I don't know…" he blurted.

"What?" Gaara asked.

"Don't you think they acted a bit…_too_ friendly? I mean… it was weirdly subtle but man, you could like…_feel_ it…"

"Where are you going with this Kankuro? Right now your explanation for something you haven't even clarified yet sounds, "weirdly subtle," " Gaara responded coolly.

Kankuro lifted his shoulders a bit, feeling intimidated. Even in his calm, raspy voice, Gaara could silence the sands around him.

"It just seems kind of strange that they're paired up all the time. Even if we're in a large group, those two tend to just… _gravitate_ towards one another…"

"What's your point?"

"Fine, clearly you're ignoring subtlety, so here's my point: They're flirty. More and more every freaking time they see each other."

Gaara's eyes quickly flicked over to Kankuro, who continued.

"I mean, just the way she treats him and talks to him and all. Haven't you noticed she never talks to anyone else like that, just that kid? If you watch them and talk with them individually, they sure as heck don't act that way, but I swear the moment they're together…don't tell me you haven't noticed?" he asked, in an accusatory manner.

Gaara walked on quietly.

"You still haven't made your point. And yes, I have noticed."

"So…it doesn't bother you?"

"Why should it? She's older than both of us—"

"And he's as young as _you_!" Kankuro argued.

"That doesn't really matter, does it? Especially for him?"

Kankuro was quiet for a time. But clearly, he wanted to quarrel.

"Who the hell talks about hormones in front of a girl? I mean…what the _hell_!?"

"If it bothers you so much, talk about it with her when she gets back. There's no use, nor do I find it wise to be yelling at me about it." He looked to Kankuro darkly, who grew quiet again. "We both know she is very intelligent and discerning, so I am not worried about her in that sense. Clearly, she spends more time with him than any of us, and if she is comfortable enough to express herself more straightforwardly and comfortably with him, than I see no reason to argue about it if it makes her happy. Leave it alone for now, Kankuro."

--

Through the flailing sands that continuously sailed through the sky, Shikamaru and Temari ran on. A slight smile had remained on Temari's face since her departure. She didn't exactly know why it was there, but she had no problem with it, and let it remain. Shikamaru ran beside her, never saying a word. For nearly a day's travel, they ran on with no verbal communication, and only the wind to break the silence.

Temari's eyes lowered slightly, and they eventually drifted to her young escort. He was unusually quiet. He wasn't the most talkative person in the world, but he was always natural and comfortable with prompting and maintaining a conversation. As of now though, he hadn't said a peep since they left the village. He didn't look tired or drained. Quite the contrary, he looked fresh, and appeared to be holding back his strength. She looked onward again, and the silent travel continued. It wasn't until several minutes later though, that Temari began noticing something very peculiar—something that didn't start occurring until now.

Shikamaru was continuously turning his head to look at her.

He wasn't just turning his eyes, he would turn his whole head and look straight at her before returning his sight on where he was going— and then do it again. Temari had lost count how many times he looked at her. He even dropped back slightly, perhaps in an attempt to get away with the repetitive act.

"What is it?" Temari smiled calmly, lowering her head and closing her eyes for a moment, "you miss me or something?" This time she turned to get a good look at his face. To her confusion, his eyes lowered somberly, and freely roamed the earth they treaded on. They appeared darker than before. There was a strange dullness about them that actually made her catch her breath.

'Geez, who died?'She thought to herself.

Shikamaru suddenly came to a sliding stop. Temari stopped and looked at him.

"Let's stop here for the night." Shikamaru walked away and began unpacking.

Temari watched him for a moment before looking to the sun. Indeed, it would not be long before nightfall. He was observant despite whatever was ailing him.

She decided timing would be key here. Never in the years and many hours spent with him, did he ever act this distant. She waited till there was a chance he wouldn't be distracted with anything. As silently as him, she unpacked her belongings.

"Check out that sunset," he said pointing with his chin as he unraveled his sleeping bag.

Temari blinked.

'Well that was unexpected of him…'

She turned and looked to the setting sun. An unusual combination of purple and crimson smears fiercely pierced each other in violent beauty. Temari took a breath paused completely.

"Pretty isn't it?"

Temari silently agreed with him and nodded. She then quickly faced him. This was the most talking he had done since they left the village. Perhaps it was a good idea to pursue her curiosities.

"Need help?" she asked.

"Naw, I'm almost done…" he kindled the fire.

Temari kept her eyes on him a moment longer.

"I'm gonna get a better look at the sunset. You should take a break or you'll miss out on what you discovered," she turned away smiling, "look how fierce those rays are."

"I will…" he continued to set up the wood.

Temari didn't believe him in the least, and walked over to the top of a small drop off she spotted on the way to the site.

'What's with him…?' She thought with a hard look. 'He's bringing me down with his eyes alone…'

She grasped at a bit of desert grass with her hands. She felt unwillingly disturbed, and downright hurt…the subtle brush-offs, and general coldness of his attitude. Normally she could confront him of any bad behavior with tyrannical vigor, but the newness and suddenness of this depressing attitude he brought, was something she was struggling to confront.

She couldn't take three days of this. Three days of continually exchanging torment. She lifted her head and took a breath. Just as she contemplated on how to speak with him, a body suddenly planted itself next to her.

Temari flinched and turned. Shikamaru was sitting next to her, looking onward at the sunset. A slight smile etched across this scruffy, sand-beaten face; but his eyes…appeared darker than ever.

Temari shook her head in disbelief. Just when she thought she was going to have to pry him open for answers, he goes on a keeps his word…

"Hey…" he blurted.

"Hey, Shikamaru…" she said, gentler than she intended.

"How's everything…?"

"Not too good…" she answered quietly.

"No?" Shikamaru turned to her in concern. His reaction had the most life in it since Temari lifted her hand to his head to comment on his height.

"No," she said slowly looking to him. "You see, a friend of mine from another village has been very distant and cold to me lately. I can see pain in his eyes in everything he does. I don't know what's wrong with him. He's obviously been through something rather traumatic, but he won't talk to me about it. So…in turn, it hurts me a bit as well…"

Shikamaru turned to face her completely.

Temari turned to him as well.

"How have things been going for you?" she asked kindly, though an obvious mocking in her quiet tone.

Shikamaru smiled, but his eyes just wouldn't let up on their misery.

"Temari…"

_Why_ did she shiver when he said her name?

"I want to apologize."

Temari raised her brows, puzzled.

"About what?" she couldn't help a laughing smile at this.

"Everything…" he said seriously.

Temari stared. She had never seen such serene misery in any face she'd ever encountered.

"Everything…" he repeated quietly. He shifted his weight, stretched out his long legs and fiddled with his fingers; all in some attempt to find the right words to explain himself.

"I was never really fair was I…?" He looked down and folded his hands, "particularly to you…"

"Shikamaru—?" no cognitive thought lapsed through her mind before she shook her head in bafflement. He went on.

"I always spewed out demands and standards that women should have—saying they should do this, be like this, act like this, behave like this…"

"…"

"And then I wouldn't apply any compatible standards for us guys…" his hands fidgeted more, "sure I'd have an innate obligation to protect the village, but those were someone else's standards, not mine. I had my own personal obligation to my comrades, but that was as far as it went—Alpha male, taking care of his pack…like damn animals…add ninjas, deadly weapons, strategic talk, and a flak vest, and you've got me."

Temari was absolutely stunned silent.

"I especially feel like I've insulted you." He looked at her. "You were the kind of woman I convinced myself I should be annoyed by the most. You were the kind of woman I thought needed finishing school. Never mind the fact that you were an orphan. Never mind the fact that you were old enough to have a relationship with your mother, but young enough to be consumed in writhing pain and confusion from her sudden death. Never mind the fact that despite all that, here you are, in a peaceable relationship with my village, and trying to make a friend out of someone like me."

Temari flinched and blinked repeatedly at his last statement.

"You lived the majority of your life without proper parentage, while all I did was bitch and moan about mine…" He cringed and lowered his head, "damn… I was such an ass back then..."

"Shi—Shikamaru!" Temari chocked. There was a sudden battle of emotions coursing through her. At the moment she wanted to combat his self-degrading apology, the partial truth of it caused near physical pain. It wasn't because she _actually_ thought Shikamaru was an ass, no, it was because she herself never really thought about her lonely childhood in such a way. She wouldn't allow herself too. She channeled all anger, pain, fear and hatred through her crushing iron fan—through crushing her opponent's bones. Being a ninja was a best way to cope. It was a license to wield any weapon of her choice, and bash any opponent of her choice to bits. No one would ever question any violent tendencies—because she was a ninja—so it was okay.

Even so…when all was said and done, when her fan had slipped, bloody and drenched from her twitching fingers; when her knees had hit the ground, and victory was hers…she never really wanted to hurt anyone. She never really wanted to take anyone's life. Only when that life threatened the ever thin, fragile ties to her immediate family, was she willing to bury it in the sand, to be eaten away by its silent erosion.

What struck even deeper, and what shook her to the core even more; was the idea of comparing her childhood to his. She had never done such a thing. It never even occurred to her to do so.

"Shikamaru…" she took a breath and looked at him. He fixed his eyes on her. She had his full attention.

"Don't say anything like that," her voice was mild, but shrewd, "I…I always thought you were very kind." She brushed her bangs back and sighed. Being so bold and upfront was her forte, but that particular talent was sapped from her during this _special_ occasion.

"You may not have always verbalized it, and you may not have so obviously expressed yourself, but there was a way you behaved…the little things you did, the things you talked about or mentioned revealed to me that …despite the visually obvious faults everyone else and even _I _accused you of… you proved that—you really were a good guy…"

'Lord…' she thought frantically.

"I mean—for crying out loud, Shikamaru, look at you. What was _I _doing when I was your age?"

Shikamaru raised a curious brow.

"Rescuing me," he answered.

"Okay, a few months before that?"

Shikamaru didn't want to bring it up.

"I was invading your damn village, that's what I was doing. Damn it, Shikamaru, you go on demeaning yourself and you can't even compare to the things I've done. Hell, you considered me a pain in your ass when I was on _your_ side!"

"Temari!" he growled.

She took a breath and wanted to continue, but his eyes and his voice could silence her like nothing else.

"I don't think you realize that I already answered your explanation in advance," he spoke with more authority than she knew he possessed.

"Whatever it was you did in the past, I already acknowledged a viable reason, that being your tremendously sucky upbringing, and yet you still turned out fine and peace-loving in the end. I'm not comparing you to me as far as doing "bad things," " he clarified, "I'm comparing our past reactions to those past situations. You had a reason for your behavior. I didn't. You had a rough, frightening, painful childhood. I didn't. I lived as peaceable a life as any ninja could, and all I could do was react as a spoiled brat to it all…and I'm apologizing for that…I am…" he was starting to sound more feeble now.

"I'm saying I didn't have reason or merit for my demands of other people, particularly women. I'm saying you don't have to expect that from me anymore…"

Temari studied his eyes with keen focus. Everything was so sincere, and almost child-like about him.

"You…really thought about this, didn't you?" she asked quietly.

"Well…I did. It's tormented me for months and I thought I knew exactly what I was going to say but— I forgot all of it once I saw you in person at the village. All of that was on the fly..."

Temari kept her eyes on him before sighing and looking down.

"Shikamaru…I understand what you mean and where you're going with this, but before I prove you wrong, there's one thing you said that kind of disturbed me, and that I disagree with. What you've acknowledged about _my _childhood tells me you actually listened and bothered to remember the conversations we've had in the past. I really appreciate that—but you still didn't live my life…and you can't say I had a reason for my actions. Regardless of my harsh upbringing, I know now that it's in no way an excuse to how wretched I've been to people."

She turned to him.

"As for you…I always looked up to _you_, lazy bum."

Shikamaru eyed her curiously. He thought she was joking at first.

"That's right. You, Nara Shikamaru, have always impressed me. Ever since you could've, but didn't defeat me during the Chunnin exams, I always begrudgingly acknowledged your skills. Even when I was insulting you, calling you lazy, idiot, or whatnot; deep down, you always impressed me, damn you."

Shikamaru couldn't resist a smirk.

Temari looked away with seriousness now.

"As I got to spend more time with you though, I realized that you had a really subtle way of revealing how kind you are, and no matter how subtle, I've seen how it greatly affects everyone around you. You really know how my make your imprints anonymous, even if you're the main cause of success—all in your vain attempt to keep yourself hidden from greatness, and riding on the opinions of being average…"

Shikamaru's eyes flicked to her suddenly. He absolutely had no idea she had him under such acute surveillance. He was rather nervous now of how much more she may know of him, and was not revealing at the moment. Now he knew he had completely underestimated her.

As if expecting his reaction, Temari was staring at him with a triumphant expression.

"Well—not subtle enough I suppose," he responded, failing to hide his amazement, "I really had no idea you were so vigilant of my mundane routines."

"You call them mundane, Shikamaru. Being a genius I suppose that's expected of you. But someone with enough intelligence, minus the genius aspect, might find them fascinating," she responded coolly.

Shikamaru's eyes mellowed, and he faced her with a 'subtle' smile.

"I always observed how observant you were…" Temari said quietly, with a kind of finality in her tone.

"You aren't some animal, Shikamaru, and I never felt that you were obligated to apologize to anyone—particularly me." She eyed him carefully. He was staring at her expectantly, only making her suddenly nervous.

"But—if you insist…" She looked him straight in the eyes, and couldn't help a shy, crooked smile.

"I forgive you."

Shikamaru remained staring at her for a time. Then, a broad, content grin moved over his face, and he looked away.

"Thanks…I feel better now." He sighed, with his smile becoming fully genuine.

Temari unknowingly smiled back. It seemed that a heavy, nagging burden did lift from him, but she knew there was something that led to this very bizarre, and very un-Shikamaru like confession slash apology.

"So what is it?" she asked tonelessly.

"Huh?"

"What happened? No matter what the situation, I'm always so use to you being calm and cool—even if you did do something that was your fault. I've never seen you so distraught and troubled. It's put me through a bit of stress to see you look so miserable in your attempt to hide some kind of agony, even over these few hours we've been traveling together. Something happened didn't it?"

Silence.

"Yeah," he rasped.

Temari looked at him intently. Now she knew how serious this was. He could explain the situation more calmly to his subordinates or other sensei's, but he could not bring himself to even look at Temari when he intended on revealing—

"Akatsuki…" his voice cracked, "murdered my sensei…"

Temari didn't know what to say. She felt horrible for her jest at the thought of someone close to him dying, having witnessed his behavior earlier. She slowly clenched her hands. So this was it. This is what turned her cool cat into a voiceless mute. She knew how close he was to Asuma.

"Shikamaru…"

"They worked in pairs, like all of the members," he went on, "They were called the immortals. And one of them…really did seem immortal. They were Hidan and Kakuzu. Hidan was the one that killed my sensei."

Temari lowered her head and looked away.

"I'm so sorry Shikamaru…I know he wasn't just a teacher to you…"

"Worst part of it though…" Shikamaru gritted his teeth. "Asuma-sensei… and Kurenai-sensei… were married…"

Temari's eyes widened.

"And Kurenai is pregnant. She'll be due in about three months…"

Temari placed a hand over her brow and she took a breath.

"Well hell, Shikamaru…" she whispered. She understood everything now. It wasn't just his dead sensei. It wasn't just his dead mentor…friend. It was the fatherless child, the widowed mother, and the already broken home, before the child was even born.

She could only gaze sympathetically in his direction, knowing nothing to say, but strangely enough, Shikamaru was looking at her with a mellow smile.

"I'm going to take care of their child."

"…"

"Yup. I vowed to take care of Asuma's child when he's born. He won't have a father but…at least he'll have a guy to look up to."

Temari absolutely could not believe what she was hearing. It left her hand trembling to her chest, and all of her memories and thoughts of Shikamaru…well…

"You're…helping to take care of the child?" she breathed.

Shikamaru stared as if her reaction was expected. His eyes softened and his smile grew.

"That's right…Asuma's own son…I think we'll get along real well. He'll probably be a bit of a handful, but it'll be worth it. Besides— it'll be good practice."

"…Practice?" Temari grunted unintentionally.

"Yeah…" Shikamaru stopped there. He specially wanted to have this specific conversation at another time. He hoped she would be too timid of the personal subject matter, and would just drop it.

Sure enough, she folded her hands and looked away.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

"Nothing," she answered, "it's just…sort of unexpected and all…but at the same time," she looked at him, "I can see you doing that."

She laughed a little.

"Playing and wrestling with a little kid, doing silly _guy_ stuff," she emphasized lightheartedly, "daring each other to jump on the biggest stag. It's so unlike you, but for some reason, it's easy for me to imagine." She smiled at him.

"That's what happens when you fantasize about me too much, see?" he blurted.

"Wh—What!?" she exclaimed, her heart racing and her cheeks flushing.

"That's right— the more you think about me, the easier it is to see me doing _anything_," he accused teasingly, his signature sly grin and furrowed brows encompassing his face.

"Yeah right, you wish!" she shot back; cheeks growing hotter still.

"Was I wearing a cowboy hat while I was riding that stag I was dared to jump on?"

"Shut uahahaha!" she started laughing hysterically at the sudden visual in her mind.

"I'm shirtless too, aren't I?"

Temari had officially lost it now. Shikamaru was the only person who could make her laugh so much, let alone laugh at all. His dry, blunt sense of humor, combined with his sly, devious mannerisms became something she came to love and long for when she remained at home, while he remained a three days journey in another village.

During the time of her laughter, Temari, in the quiet of her mind came to realize just how much she missed his company, and felt herself desiring more of it. Indeed, she was somewhat appeasing him, but she was still clearly enjoying the simple pleasure of what his presence did to her. She was very aware that something had changed in him. His personality quirks, inborn traits and characteristics would never leave him…but she knew he would not be completely the same. It was something she had seen so many times before, and it was something she had experienced herself. She understood, and accepted this. She accepted him as he was before, and she accepted him as he is now.

He was finally getting his lot of death in life—late— but it finally happened, and that was nothing new to her. Shikamaru had the guts to pour his heart out on the matter in one sitting, and apologize for something she could care less about to boot. At the very least, she could help him cope with this new and very real tragic experience. She knew how much his presence  
comforted her. Perhaps from this point on, the comfort and ease could be mutual between them, if it was not already.

* * *

**Next Chapter: **Inevitable Details

* * *

**  
Author's Note: **Dear Masashi Kishimoto,

Can this chapter become canon? Please? I'll bake you a cake…or…something. No it will not contain illegal mind controlling substances. What do you take me for? Only the legal kinds of course…in America.

hugs and kisses- Riot


	2. Chapter 2: Inevitable Details

**Author's Note:** I must thank all of you for your awesome reviews. I honestly believed maybe 2 people were gonna read this thing. I already told another user that I seriously thought I was going to get reviews like, "Ehhhhhhh, it's all right……"—or— "YOU SUX0RZZZ!!1!!11!!"

Luckily, I've avoided such criticism as of yet. Of course I may be speaking too soon.

Here be le continuation. Hope you enjoy.

--

Chapter 2: Inevitable Details

--

_Konohagakure 10:28 am_

Sitting in a heap of boredom at their posts, two gray-suited shinobi halfheartedly tried to keep themselves occupied. One had a tussle of spiky hair sprouting from his oddly bandaged head. The other looked much more civil, with his hair forcibly curtained straight down his face due to his bandana-like headband. The two yawned and stretched and flipped through page after page of reports, but these actions were of little hindrance to the extreme monotony.

"You hear? Konohamaru's team is entering in this term's exam. Think he'll have a chance?" asked Izumo.

"Already? Man…time flies, huh? Well, if he's anything like Naruto, it'll be awhile. The kid's pretty strong, but he's just too much of a kid… I don't think he really get's it yet," Kotetsu replied.

As they continued on with their paper flipping and small talk, they both slowly shuffled and drew their attention to the entrance. Both had sensed the approach of a pair of ninja.

At first, Kotetsu was feeling too lazy to get up and exchange obligatory formalities. Izumo elbowed him slightly.

"C'mon— better greet them properly," he said, getting up.

"Aww, can't we just wave at them when they pass by?" Kotetsu droned.

"Hey, remember, she's the Ambassador, _and_ the Kazekage's sister…not to mention, the daughter of the former..."

Kotetsu widened his eyes and gritted his teeth. "Oh…right!" He got up after Izumo and stood with him by the gate.

Shikamaru and Temari approached at a leisure walk and stopped before the two.

"Hey guys," Shikamaru drawled.

"Came a few hours earlier than we expected," Kotetsu said, "glad you got back safely."

"Temari-san, this is from Lady Tsunade." Izumo handed her a sealed package. "I believe it entails where you'll be staying— and a few letters and minor reports about scheduled meetings and such."

"Thank you," she said, looking it over.

"Enjoy your stay here."

Temari nodded respectably at both of them and walked onward, with Shikamaru by her side.

"..."

"…Whatta ya think, huh?" Kotetsu whirred.

"Huh?" Izumo blurted mindlessly.

"Walkin' kinda close together, don't you think?" Kotetsu murmured when the two shinobi were well out of earshot.

Izumo looked at him with gritted teeth and lifted both hands in bafflement, before using one of them to shove him in the shoulder.

"Dude! You're gonna get us both in trouble!" he seethed. "Have you forgotten that there's a _person_ attached to that five foot iron fan?"

Kotetsu winced. "Eeeee…" he cringed, "Glad it ain't my job to guide her around."

--

It was still too early in the morning for a lot of activity in the gravel roads of Konoha; but there was still a good number of shuffling feet, laughing children, and the general hum of constant talking in the air.

"You wanna get some tea so you can sit and open that up?" Shikamaru suggested. "It's too early for lunch."

Temari looked up at him and suddenly smiled. "You mean you'd treat me to lunch?" she asked in mock sweetness, clasping her hands together.

Shikamaru gave a gruff smile. "Well… yeah, I mean— I gotta be civil you know?"

Temari gave out a satisfied, "humph," before scoping out the area for a shop. She picked out a popular, busy little teahouse at a small roadside junction.

The two sat at an outside bench, where Temari promptly opened up the envelope.

"Let's see here: keys…apartment keys, no doubt—and a crap load of papers. Well, I'll just sift through these and see which one jumps out at me," she said heartily.

"Very professional announcement as the ambassador to the Leaf," Shikamaru smirked.

"Hey, I've been babysitting you for the past year as ambassador, so don't go pinning me with politeness 101. I could practice the rules and regulations game in my sleep. Besides, I'm with you right now, so I don't have to regurgitate them.

Shikamaru recoiled and tried to stifle a laugh, but he couldn't resist chuckling at her ability to make formalities sound disgusting.

They spent a good slow half hour, sipping their tea restfully, as Temari started going over her papers more seriously now. Shikamaru was leaned back against his chair, soaking up this time of temporary relaxation. Neither was exhausted from the journey, but both had enough tire to enjoy being lazy for a while at the teashop.

As Temari sipped her tea and flipped through several pages, she began sensing a gnawing feeling of déjà vu. Only, instead of being in a smoldering desert, it was in the cool confines of a little teashop.

His eyes were on her again. He was staring again. Now he wasn't periodically looking away. He had nowhere to go. She was sitting right before him.

Growing more self-conscious because of this, and also aiming to get a certain reaction from him, Temari blocked all but her eyes with the report sheet.

Just as she suspected—without ever taking her eyes off the paper, and only depending on her peripheral vision, she noticed Shikamaru shift to sit taller—to see her face better, no doubt. Temari successfully resisted a smile, and lowered the paper just to her mouth. Sure enough, Shikamaru relaxed a little.

Now she couldn't resist a smile. She quickly flapped the papers to the table, releasing the stack entirely. She raised her head up with a wry smile at him and opened her mouth to speak.

"Temari!" he blurted suddenly, before she could say anything. Temari raised her head slightly and blinked.

"So…what are your plans for today?" he asked, gulping and trying to recompose himself in a much more clumsy manner than Temari was use to.

However, for the time being, Temari seemed to push aside the little incident, as her mind instinctively collected up an answer to the question.

"Well, I've got a meeting tomorrow afternoon," she picked up one of the letters, "I've got today to rest up and familiarize my self with the surroundings of the main offices again."

"So…do you need me after I take you to the embassy?"

Temari tilted her head in playful suspicion. "Why? You gotta hot date?"

Shikamaru snickered with bared teeth and lowered his head.

"No, but I do have plans. Unless you really need me, there's a few things I need to take care of…"

"Like what?"

Shikamaru looked at her as if begging for understanding.

"It's personal…"

Temari raised her brows. "Oh…? You can't tell me?"

"Well…not now. I will though, for sure. Anyways, you 'bout ready?"

"Yeah." Temari gathered up her recent belongings and took up her pack. She followed Shikamaru a few steps out before stopping.

"Wait a second…did you say embassy?"

"That's right. No more staying in apartments for you. The building's finally finished. They'll be your living quarters while you're here. It's where all the foreign attendants will be staying from now on."

"Wow, you guys are spoiling me. Where is this place?"

"By the main building. Makes things more convenient for you."

"Well aren't you leaf ninja so sweet and thoughtful," she teased, throwing her bag over her shoulder as they entered the ever-crowding road.

As they headed to the largest building site in the village, the staring face of Shikamaru came into Temari's mind again. She quickly glanced at him to see where his eyes were. They were casually cast forward, aiming steadily in front of him.

Temari lowered her gaze and here brows furrowed in thought. Well— there were people walking to and fro, no doubt she felt he would take notice of their own stares. Perhaps that related to the matter.

Temari glanced up at him again, more subtly this time. The quality of his eyes had significantly improved. They didn't look nearly as bogged down and downcast as when he first picked her up.

Though she thought his improvement was rather amazing, she was still reluctant to give full credit his emotional confession back in Suna. She didn't think it was possible for him to hold the darkness so long in his eyes like that, up until that moment.

Her thoughts back tracked further as she recollected the fact that he had been so persistent to keep those eyes on her, for _days_ now…

Temari pondered, but didn't want to nail down any specific reason, yet she was very aware that he never did it before.

Shikamaru guided her to a generously sized building with vast windows and a double door entrance. Temari was wordlessly pleased with the outlook, but before they even made it to the doors—

"Good Morniiiiiiiiiing!" sang a shrill, cheery voice accompanied by prancing footsteps.

"Five bucks I know who that is without turning around," said Temari, eyes still on the doors.

"I might as well just _give_ you five dollars then." Shikamaru protested.

"Hey, Temari-san! Wow, you guys are back already? I thought you wouldn't be back till nightfall. I guess you were able to motivate Shikamaru's lazy butt, huh?" Ino suddenly bounded in front of Temari.

"She's a slave driver," answered Shikamaru.

Temari gave him a dangerous smile and elbowed him in the ribs hard enough to send him grunting through a grin.

"Well, I have to admit, he isn't _as_ lazy as he use to be," Ino felt she was informing. "I actually hear you train once in a while. Is that true, Shikamaru?" she asked.

"Once in a while…" he repeated.

"Did you—have to— run so— fast!" came Chouji, panting up to them. "You had me dodging traffic back there after you squealed and took off!"

"Oh, I'm sorry Chouji. I just left you in the dust didn't I?" Ino sympathized.

For the first time a good long while, Shikamaru was actually dreading their company. There was something he wanted to tell Temari before he showed her to her room, but now with these two present…

"Hey Temari, let's go hang out a bit, and we'll have lunch later, huh?"

Temari sighed through a smile as Ino's hyperactive suggestion sounded more like an eager demand. It had been awhile since she'd seen these two, so she decided to give in.

"Yeah, all right, I'll go with you."

"You game, Shikamaru?" Ino questioned, facing him.

Shikamaru's eyes scanned everyone's face, and he pondered the situation for a mere second. Temari thought he looked at her with a hint of anxiety in his eyes.

"Sorry guys, can't make it. I gotta take care of some things." He looked to Temari. "There's a card in there with your floor and room number. And since you're going with these two, I don't have to worry about you getting lost after you leave." He took a step back from all of them.

"I'll see you about a half hour before your meeting tomorrow," he told Temari. With that, he lifted two fingers near his chin, and zipped out of their vision in an instant.

Temari stared quietly at where he had disappeared. Chouji had a look as though expecting his disappearance, while Ino had a look that was both expectant and annoyed.

"You two have any idea what he's up to?" Temari asked.

Chouji remained silent as Ino sighed. "Well…as far as we know, it's one of two things. He's either off to do a ridiculous amount of studying and jutsu training, a ridiculous amount of taijutsu and strategic training, or he's off to see—"

Ino looked at Temari quickly and carefully. Temari's eyes softened, and she gave a small smile.

"Shikamaru…told me about Asuma-sensei and Kurenai-sensei."

Ino took a breath while Chouji looked downward.

"Let me put my stuff in my room. If you guys don't mind…I'd like to know a little more about what's going on as well. I won't be long."

"All right. We'll wait here for you."

A few minutes later, Temari came back down and approached them.

"All right…I'll unpack later. Let's walk and talk, shall we?"

The three made their way to a vicinity of resting areas that was open and well inhabited by creeks, ponds, and tall growing grasses and trees. They chatted back and forth about how each of them was doing, and how the Sand Village had been holding up since the whole Akatsuki ordeal with Gaara. Eventually though, Temari's attention reversed to a more recent concern.

"So…care to clue me in on Shikamaru's recent departure from sanity?"

Ino and Chouji didn't take her joking as lightly as they wanted. There was a sort of uniform recoiling between the two. Instead of waiting for an answer from either of them, Temari went on.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean in that way. Shikamaru only told me so much when he picked me up, but he certainly didn't mention anything about horrendous training. Besides, didn't you just call him lazy and say he only trained once in awhile?"

"I was only kidding with him," Ino said softly. "You see, for the longest time, Chouji and I wondered why we weren't seeing a lot of him lately. At first, it was sort of understandable, when the wounds were fresh and all, but after awhile…it seemed to get worse, you know?"

Temari listened.

"One day, we got permission and finally decided to see if there was a chance of looking for him at his clan's forest. Now, I don't know much about deer, but even _I_ could tell they were acting strange."

"They sure as heck wouldn't let us get close to them," Chouji added. "There was no way we were gonna mess with those stags. It's like they know how to sharpen their own antlers or something."

"The trees in that forest are freakishly huge, so we were able to get a good look from there," Ino went on, "sure enough, Shikamaru was clocked out and torn up in the middle of the herd. It's like they were keeping an eye on him or something."

"That's how you found out about this training of his?" Temari asked.

"We questioned him about it when we finally bumped into him in the village. He didn't deny it, but he certainly didn't tell us anything specific." Ino answered.

"Even judging from where we were in the treetops, he looked pretty bad. We took off after we saw him get up and head somewhere else, but we still told his dad about what we saw," said Chouji.

Temari took a little while to take it all in. "You also say he visits Kurenai-sensei regularly?" she asked.

"That's right. Checks up on her…" Ino lowered her head, "re-breaks his heart a little every time, but he's been getting better about that after every visit. Smiles a lot more…" she smiled gently, as her head rolled upward to the sky.

"Looks at the clouds a lot less too…" Chouji added quietly. Temari eyed him curiously.

"Yeah…I noticed that too…" Ino said quietly, "Hardly ever just lays around and stares at them the way he use to. But when he does, it's only for a moment it seems like. The thoughtfulness in his eyes seems to make up for all the hours he's lost from staring at them in his youth…"

There was a still, solicitous quiet shared among the three. Temari looked to them, to see which would go on.

"We visit Kurenai as well," Ino would continue, "I can scan for any health issues with my medical jutsus. Of course, she's been battling with bouts of depression, but other then that, she's been very healthy. She'll be having her baby real soon now…"

Again, Temari took some time to reflect on everything. She recalled major and minors events with Shikamaru through the desert journey, and now added the new, current information to the equation. Even so, she felt like she didn't know half of what was adding up to the current Shikamaru.

"So…" she decided to speculate, "to your guy's displeasure, Shikamaru disappears regularly to be a good soldier, and trains under his own hand, quite harshly, quite frequently, with the added element of breaking his own heart again and again whenever he visits to comfort Kurenai-sensei, which is meant to be beneficial for both, even though it wrenches them consciously every time… Did I guess right?" she turned to a baffled Ino.

"How in the hell—"

"You're about as observant as he is," Chouji quietly interrupted his former teammate.

"Shikamaru's sharp as a tack—I imagine that he's very creative and ingenious with whatever bizarre training methods he uses," Temari went on. "In fact…I bet they're down right brutal if he'd allow so much pain on himself, which on the other hand, he's had a history of not doing."

"You'd be surprised…" Ino said quietly, "Although we gave up ever looking for him now that we know what he's been up too, I've seen him real torn up. Sometimes he's bleeding pretty bad too. It's funny," Ino smiled, putting hand to her head. "I've never ever in my life seen him bleed so much, until recently with his mysterious training of his. It's hella ironic."

Temari stared at the gently rippling creek before turning to look at her.

"So…in the end, I'm guessing he's training like this so that he can take care of that Hidan bastard that killed your sensei?"

Both Ino and Chouji looked at Temari, stunned.

"Wait. What?" Chouji blurted.

"You mean…he didn't tell you?" Ino asked more composed.

Temari looked at them quizzically. "Tell me what?" she asked, tightening up by their expressions.

"Shikamaru already killed him…"

Temari stared blankly. It wasn't long before her eyes widened, and her mouth went agape. She wasn't even sure why she felt so shocked, but it was probably due to the sudden bombardment of confusion, that led to her temporary muteness.

"He...he what?"

"So he didn't tell you? Gosh, I wonder why," Ino marveled, her eyebrows creasing in thought, "Shikamaru led our squad to avenge Asuma-sensei right here on the grounds of Konoha; within the forest the of the Nara clan in fact. Kakashi was assigned as team leader by Tsunade, but it was Shikamaru who orchestrated the whole plan that even Kakashi followed. He managed to separate Hidan from his partner Kakuzu, and they split from the scene. A little after Kakuzu was defeated, Shikamaru waltzes up, not at all injured, though he was a bit dirty, like all of us."

Temari's eyes wandered around the ground. She wished she pursued the subject matter with him further at the time he brought it up, but he seamlessly changed the subject so quickly and so smoothly, just before making her lose herself in laughter afterward. It was hard for her to believe he wasn't intentional about it either. She knew how sneaky and sly he could be, all the while being honest and kind at the same time.

She looked back up at the two. Now she was curious.

"How exactly did Shikamaru defeat Hidan?"

Ino turned toward Chouji with her head down, while he avoided any eye contact as well.

"Actually," Ino began, with a frustrated cringe, "we don't know." She faced Temari again. "To this day, none of us know how Shikamaru defeated him. He won't tell anyone. Some people don't even know he's responsible."

'Well I expected _that_ much,' Temari thought. "Isn't it in his report?" she asked.

"No," Ino shook her head. "There's no requirement for how you complete a mission. All that's mandatory is if it was passed, failed, and any information that might lead to a possible joint mission."

"I asked him directly once," Chouji said suddenly.

Both kunoichi looked at him.

"I asked him real serious-like, too," he went on. "He just shook his head. And said something like, "All that matters is that he's gone now. He's dead. I don't want to talk about it for a long time… Maybe we'll discuss this another day…" or something like that." Chouji shrugged. "I even said he was obligated to at least tell us, since we're the original Team 10. I even got a little revved up, thinking that might help. I told him I wanted to know how he killed that bastard… He didn't fall for that one, and gave me a long-winded excuse I sure as heck can't remember. But it was sort of scary to hear him talk like that, so I didn't push it…"

Temari looked down with brooding eyes. Why on earth would he not tell _anyone_…?Was he just being a complete baby about it? No…there's no way. She knew it was a sensitive subject, sure, but she also knew how well Shikamaru could forgive and forget about things of the past (especially with her)—but in this case it was more like: avenge—and sit on it. It seemed too strange. Shikamaru wasn't one to mope around, hold a grudge, or keep secrets.

Unless…

"I can't imagine he did anything particularly gruesome to defeat Hidan," Ino mused, "I mean, he came back without a drop of blood on him. Hardly any scratches as well. I wonder what strategy he used..."

Temari said nothing. 'I wonder what strategy he's using now,' she thought incisively. 'Why on earth would he keep it to himself? Is this another one of his year in advance plans in order to purposefully keep us in the dark? Am I just thinking about it too hard?'

"You think there's a reason he's not telling anyone?" Temari spoke finally. She looked up at the two, who were understandably staring at her.

"I can only think of two possibilities," Temari went on, "One being more like him, and the other…about as strange as his behavior lately."

"Probably the latter," Ino murmured.

"Well, he's either got some ridiculous, concocted plan of three hundred different dimensions which serves as his reason for not telling anyone, or…he's afraid…"

Chouji and Ino blinked in unison.

"But that doesn't seem like him, does it?" Temari queried.

"Even the first one sounds a bit too troublesome for him, but it's better than what we've come up with."

"What, what were your theories?" Temari asked.

"Zilch," Ino confessed.

Temari sighed. She expected as much from them. However, she wondered how far she should venture into this curiosity. It made her somewhat nervous that she was digging into what was very well, his personal space.

Her hands began to fidget and rub together. She couldn't help herself. The complexity of the situation— _his_ complexity— seemed to call out for her resolve. It was as if beyond all this— was a mere, simple test of his own concoction.

The liking for it almost made her feel vulnerable. She craved his challenges. She wished to solve them. She reached for them. They were tempting to her. She especially couldn't help herself now that her insides were churning with excitement from them. She may have never trumped him, but the satisfied smirk she would see on his face when she had figured out one of his tests, always gave her a fiery chill. That was why she pursued. That was why she was continuing on with this challenge. She fed off of it.

"You…don't think it's because he's aware of the judgment that will be placed on him— if he told everyone how he killed the guy, do you?"

Ino looked at her doubtfully, "I don't think he's that vain," she answered, "he never takes insults seriously, no matter how ridiculous, grotesque or stupid they are. He's so confident, it never riles him up, 'cause he knows how wrong they are. He's not like Naruto who takes everything personally, (probably because they're true)," she said, waving her hand.

"I'm not talking about being vain, though," Temari said softly. "Even someone like Shikamaru can worry a little about the reputation he carries with those closest to him."

Chouji looked at her slowly, and Ino lifted her head slightly in thought.

"Think about it… if this Hidan guy was immortal, what if Shikamaru cut him to pieces—totally immobilized him somehow? How else could he defeat him? Why would he want to discuss _that_ with you guys? Why _anyone_? 'Hey guys, wanna know how I killed that Akatsuki guy? I put him in a blender. Then I used him as fertilizer.' "

Ino frowned skeptically. "Look Temari, just because your tactics are uber violent gore fests; doesn't mean Shikamaru has remotely the same strategies. I can hardly see him doing _anything_ like that. He just doesn't have it in him."

"Really?" Temari asked with equal skepticism, "even to the enemy that killed your guy's sensei? The guy that murdered Kurenai-sensei's husband, and her child's own father? Is Shikamaru not one to complete his missions by whatever means possible? Regardless of whether or not they fit into everyone else's own paradigm of how he completes missions? Huh, well I'll be, Shikamaru really is a pansy after all."

Ino and Chouji flinched hard. She was right…but in a way that was more than what she suggested. Shikamaru was human too.

Although it was possible for them to consider him completing this particular mission in less than routine form, it was more than that. He just may have executed this mission in not only the most efficient way possible, but also the most brutally satisfying way possible.

Though a shinobi must force his emotions into a dark, dormant, abandoned space, where they are blind and cannot grasp hold of their user's thoughts— no matter what, their existence is stretched throughout, and cannot merely be stuffed away in a single compartment. Therefore the demands for a shinobi in the truest sense…were absolutely impossible.

What was looked for was what came closest to the ideal. It wasn't much different than an interviewer looking for the best candidate for an office job, minus the kunais, the stealth, and the killing…hopefully. The question to his closest friends became, did Shikamaru lose control to his emotions, or did he use them to his advantage?

Ino sighed. "I suppose you make a good point…but…" she shook her head, "he came back clean. I mean, _no_ blood on him. He looked like someone that went out and wrestled a bear, not like someone who came from a butcher shop."

"Well, Shikamaru's very good at surprising us, isn't he?" Temari suggested calmly, "He can hardly be predicted. He's also one for using some of the strangest, most unconventional methods._ I _know this from experience."

Ino took another breath. "Well, whatever it is, I'm sure Shikamaru isn't going to be telling us anytime soon. Let's go have lunch, huh? I'm starting to get a headache."

They all agreed, and left the peaceful little park area without another word.

--

On their way down the busy restaurant cluttered marketplace, Temari couldn't help but notice that Chouji was grinning and wringing his broad, pudgy hands with great anticipation.

"Geez, Chouji, you're like a giddy schoolgirl," Ino criticized.

"Hey Ino, can we please—"

"Yes Chouji, you'll get your barbecue beef, now stop drooling," she harped.

As the three settled down in the restaurant, Temari made her way closest to the window. She couldn't help but mull over everything since she left Suna. Again, there was the crave for that challenge of figuring all this out, but at the same time, she felt she should be over it.

Shikamaru was stressed, burdened, and going through a tough time. Why did she feel the need to help him through this so much? Sure, she made a commitment to herself that she would spend time with him, feeling it would help socially, but judging from his recent behavior, she had an inkling feeling that he was going to be annoyingly elusive. Temari sighed and shook her head. Why did the concern seem to overwhelm her? Why did she care so much? She considered him a good friend, sure, but…

Temari said her order mindlessly as she rested her cheek on her knuckles. Ino struck up a rhetorical conversation to herself as she broke her chopsticks, and called around the waiters to bring more tea and appetizers. Temari's glazed eyes stared out the window with a rather fallen countenance.

"So do you think Shikamaru's doing this crazy training stuff now as a form of guilt…? Or maybe to strengthen himself so it doesn't happen again?" Temari asked, still looking out the window.

"You really want to talk about Shikamaru, don't you?" Ino stated casually, poking at a tiny tray of bean sprouts.

Temari huffed slightly and tightened the fist she rested her face on. Her eyes slowly rolled in Ino's direction. She was still adding small portions to her plate. At this point Temari wasn't sure if she should answer after such an obvious pause, or remain quiet, since Ino seemed completely preoccupied, having only talked due to her habit of being a bag of wind. Temari decided it would be less suspicious to answer, rather than pretend she didn't hear her.

"Hey, this is all completely new and rather shocking to me, okay?" she replied casually, "I'm still use to the sluggish, slothful, lazy eyed genius; not the determined, devoted, dutiful genius. And since I do consider him a friend as well, naturally I'm a bit concerned…I mean, not concerned about him being dutiful…just about the stark change…"

Ino hadn't looked up yet, but a knowing smirk came across her face. Chouji on the other hand, quietly studied Temari with eyes more attentive and concentrating than most people thought he could manage.

Temari opened her mouth to speak again, but Ino quickly interrupted.

"I understand that, but seriously, we've been talking about him since—oh— the very second he jutsued his butt out of our vision, right?"

Though her eyes calmly closed and she sat straighter with more poise, Temari swallowed hard, and gently lowered the still clenched fist. For a brief moment, there was a sudden lapsing jolt of helplessness, despite her amazing talent for remaining composed.

Ino was absolutely right. Temari didn't even realize that out of her mouth, not only came constant words relating to her young guide, but thoughts as well, and that didn't even account for half of what remained in her mind…

"Tsh," Temari shrugged, quickly recovering, "you can't tell me he doesn't make it easy. Like I said, I'm concerned because a lot's been happening with him lately, and no doubt to the point that it affects the rest of us…"

To Ino, the reasoning was weak and not even her tone could fool her.

"Well, anyways," she said, waving her hand in front of her, "I've had enough of him for now. It's always depressing."

Ino transitioned into another subject smoothly, and even Chouji did more with his mouth besides eat, and chatted as well.

Temari lifted her brows in sympathy toward him. If he were eloquent enough, Temari was sure he'd voice himself more often, but it was clear Chouji was silently battling his own emotions as they ran rampant across his pleasant, pudgy face. At least now, she could see he was feeling better about talking of anything besides what related to Asuma.

The conversing went on easily, mostly without Temari. She chimed in once in awhile, but only to remain from being silent, so that she wasn't accused of only wanting to talk about Shikamaru.

After they had eaten their lunch, Temari was itching to just up and leave. Chouji was stuffing down his fifth plate, but he wasn't eating nearly as much as he normally did, on account that Ino made it clear that he was paying for his own meal.

When a sensible amount of time had lapsed, Temari felt there wouldn't be any suspicion in excusing herself at this point.

She liked Chouji and Ino, she really did, but she had had enough of them for today. Ino's company was especially expendable; with her sharpened habit of gossip, crosshaired on every pedestrian that passed by.

Temari stood up and stretched.

"Thanks very much for the lunch, guys, I appreciate it."

"No problem," Ino said cordially.

"Try to get Shikamaru to come with us next time, huh?" Chouji said.

"Sure. I'll tie him up in chains and drag him over," she said, turning with a wave.

"Bet you'd enjoy that," a voice murmured over the piercing sound of meat being laid over the barbeque.

Temari raised her brows and turned her head back as she kept on walking. Chouji was fully mesmerized by the reddened meat cooking over greasy bars, while a quiet, smirking Ino kept her eyes on the flame. She didn't even bother to try and be inconspicuous, but she also didn't hone up and look Temari straight in the eyes again.

Had she been her vibrantly fiery self, Temari might have stampeded right back to Ino and strangled her to take it back, but for whatever reason, she wasn't feeling up what would normally be a very satisfying physical task. She merely sighed and pushed through the entrance door.

Temari picked up the pace when she left the restaurant and headed back to the embassy suite. Before, she had only opened the door to throw her things inside, never bothering to enter, as she did not want to keep Chouji and Ino waiting.

This time of course, she walked in, intending to soak in the interior.

It was a dark, richly colored room. Black, glossy vases occupied a few dimly lit corners. There was a vast leather couch near the window that seemed to be beckoning to her. Temari took a few steps scanning the wide space to her left, which was the kitchen and dining quarters. She then glanced to her right down the hall, which she guessed led to her bedroom.

Temari headed in neither direction. She collapsed onto the fluffy leather couch and sank in comfortably. She gave out a heavy sigh, and suddenly felt wonderfully tired. It had been an eventful three days, and she realized how much time she had on her hands. She had now until tomorrow afternoon to do as she pleased, and a nice catnap was in order. She was so comfortable she curled up right there with the armrest as her pillow and hit the snooze. She'd unpack everything later.

--

* * *

**Next Chapter:** The Little Things

* * *

**Authors Note:** Lol, I fail…

Right, aside from that, I want to make something known. As far as this story goes, Temari has not been the Ambassador to the Leaf for 2.5 or 3 years, or however long the time skip occurred. Reason being; it is my theory that Kishimoto didn't have the Sand Village make Temari the ambassador when she was freaking 15-16 years old. I honestly think it was a recent decision, and she became ambassador when she was 18. Maybe, _maybe_ 17, but I seriously doubt it. And judging by how the characters were reacting and interacting with each other when Naruto first came back to the village after the time skip, they sure as heck made it sound like her going back and forth between countries was a recent procedure.

Well, that's my two cents. Hope you see the logic in it. Till next time— I poof outta here.


	3. Chapter 3: The Little Things

**Author's Note:** THIS IS NOT the new chapter. The NEXT chapter is the new one. This is chapter two, split in half, because I thought it was too long. So if you have been keeping up with the story, understand that CHAPTER 4, is the NEW chapter. Unless you feel like re-reading because it's been so freaking long since I updated, you might as well skip this. I apologize for the confusion.

--

Chapter 3: The Little Things

--

The next day, Shikamaru arrived just when he said he would, and knocked on the dark, cherry stained wood door.

Temari answered it with droopy eyes that could have challenged his as far as drowsiness went. She was fully dressed and ready for every high-ranking ninja's least favorite part of the mission: meetings.

"Excited are we?"

Temari shook her head lethargically with a sneering grin.

"Let's go."

She followed him the short distance it was to the main building. Temari wished it was a longer walk, or that she had left her apartment that morning to burn some energy.

"How long's the meeting?" Shikamaru asked.

Temari sighed. "The initial meetings are always the longest and the most tedious. Including the breaks, it could be three hours."

"Man…" Shikamaru breathed, "How long are the breaks?"

"Not long enough. 'Bout 15 minutes."

Shikamaru eyed her curiously. "Want me to get you something to eat, so you don't have to search for a place, and then take 2 seconds to inhale it?"

There was no answer from her at first.

"It's pretty ridiculous that they have this meeting at lunchtime—" he looked at her again, "and I noticed you brought nothing with you."

Temari had been staring up at him since he made his offer. Her brows lifted in a mixture of surprise and uncertainty to his offer.

"That's…very nice of you, but—"

"Just ask when your first break will be. I'll get whatever you want, it's no big deal."

Temari meant to study his face again, but when she saw his eyes intently on her, she looked away. A smile came over her. She decided she wouldn't tease him for the moment.

Shikamaru led her down the corridor where a large gathering of advisors walked into a double doorway. Shikamaru waited in the hallway before she came back out.

"First break's at 1:15," she said, leaning against the wall.

"All right. What d'you feel like?"

Temari stared at him; eyes narrowing slightly in contemplation; not for what she wanted, but in question as to why he would even bother.

His eyes didn't waver, and it was Temari who succumbed to looking away.

"Burger and fries," she said bluntly.

Shikamaru bared a toothy grin.

"Bit of variety this time," she said, arms crossed.

"All right…everything on it?"

"You know it."

"All right. See you later," he waved and was off.

"Wait, hold up," she began pulling out a small purse.

"Keep it, I'm paying," he told her brusquely, "it wouldn't be proper if I didn't treat the Sand Ambassador at least once."

Temari waited for him to say something along the lines of "Plus, I'm the man," but it didn't happen this time around.

"Wait, hold on, don't just rush off," she stepped near him.

"What's up?"

"Are you free after the meeting?" she asked.

"Dunno…why?"

"Because I want to talk to you about something."

Shikamaru's face went rather grim at her smooth tone. "Uh oh…am I in trouble?"

"No," she laughed, "why, should you be?"

"I don't know…sometimes my mom and the Hokage find a reason for me to be in trouble. What d'you want to talk about?"

"Oh…just recent events. I wanna get briefed on everything that's happened to you…_your_ team lately, especially since it's Akatsuki related." Her face grew more serious, "I know it's a sensitive subject, but I think it's important I know so I can add it to my report for Suna. I already saw _your _report…you didn't tell me you already killed Hidan…"

Shikamaru tilted his head slowly and lifted a shoulder in an awkward shrug.

"And it didn't specify that you were responsible, either," Temari calmly eyed him. "Elusive as a shadow, are we? A ninja in the truest form."

Shikamaru was quiet as his eyes were set steadily forward. "Look…it's hard to say," he raised a hand to scratch his head, "but I'll try to meet you at the library. Be in the section H, all right?"

"You mean there's a chance I _won't_ see you there?"

" 'Fraid so. But wait for me for a little while, huh?"

Temari crinkled her nose slightly and closed her eyes. She didn't have time to question why, but agreed to his proposal.

"Fine then," she sighed, "but only 'cause I trust you," she pointed at his chin. She noticed again, his jaw clenching reaction to her hand being near his face.

"See ya," she lowered her hand and turned away, heading to the meeting room. "Oh," she said before making it through the doorway.

Shikamaru looked at her, his mellow stare giving her a sudden chill.

"Thanks," she said.

"No prob."

The meeting was just as daunting as Temari had hoped for…of course, she was drowning in her own sarcasm at the thought. She was the youngest shinobi present, and that youth made her legs tingle, and her teeth clench, and her fingers twitch in impatience to all this sitting and shifting and leaning in broad leather chairs. At least they were comfortable chairs.

Temari almost felt bad for feeling more fidgety than usual. As young as she was, and having been considered a traitor only three years ago, she was greatly respected and admired by all the advisors and elders of Konoha. The older men were especially charmed by her, which was humorously cute and creepy, so long as they never crossed the line, which they never did. They were pleasant, upright old men.

When the first break came she headed to the lounge room, waiting to see Shikamaru there.

However, the first thing that caught her eye was a large bag on one of the nearest tables. She saw her name written on a stapled note. Temari looked around the room. No Shikamaru in sight. She exhaled through her nose and took up the bag.

"…"

She opened it up and ate her lunch rather glumly. She was hoping to have _someone _to talk to, having been forced to listen to a group of mostly grandpas and grandmas whose charms were flushed down the toilet once they got in an argument.

'I can't believe I have to deal with them for another two hours,' she thought grudgingly.

After her lunch, she went back into the room and eventually did manage to survive the rest of the meeting. She quickly hightailed it out of the building and headed to the library at a fast walk. She took her duty and the meetings very seriously, and took detailed, scrutinizing notes, but at the moment, it was far from her mind.

She entered the library, careful to not look like she was desperately searching for Shikamaru. She walked in casually enough. The library was enormous. Had he not specified where to find him, it might take her a week to find him. She stepped into the 'H' section and noticed no one else around. Such daunting subject matter might scare away even the most frequent library visitor. She wondered if Shikamaru intended this. It was also the quietest section of the library. You could hibernate here and no one would ever find you.

Temari scanned the area. He was nowhere in sight. She sat at the farthest end of the table, resting her head on her open palm.

"Don't know how long you intend me to wait here, Shikamaru, but I do have better things to do…" she mused to herself.

Just as her eyes fluttered in boredom and were on the brink of closing, the spine of a thick book caught her attention. Her eyes opened up in intrigue and she sat up, staring at it. After debating whether or not to put forth the effort in retrieving it, Temari finally reached over and grabbed the massive book.

She flipped over its dense, hard, cover and browsed through its content page. Although Temari declared in her mind that she wouldn't wait for Shikamaru for more then fifteen minutes, she ended up staying and reading the book for over an hour. When she realized how much time had passed, she gritted her teeth lightheartedly and picked up the book. She headed over to the check out and gingerly set the giant book down. The librarian lowered the comparatively tiny novel she was holding and smiled at the young woman before her.

"Can I check this out?" Temari asked, tapping her finger on it. At first she wasn't sure. Some books were for reference only, and could not leave the premises of the building.

"Sure you can," she said in calm cheeriness, scanning it in, "you know, that Shikamaru checks this book out all the time. You're the only one besides him. Never seen anyone else check this out in all the time I've been here. And I've worked here for longer than you've been alive, I can tell you that," she chuckled sweetly.

Temari hadn't moved. "What?"

"Yes, and others like it. I notice you're with him all the time. Is it all right if I tell him you have it, in case he comes looking for it?"

Temari lowered her head in puzzlement. She lifted her hand in sudden amazement, and didn't know what to do with it, so she lowered it slowly to the book.

A slight smile then cracked over her face.

"Sure…" she said, her eyes narrowing and her smile grew, "in fact…can you hold on a minute?" Temari ran back to the same section and picked up three other books. "How many books can I check out at a time?"

"Five, dear."

"Good, can I take these three as well?"

"Of course—" she looked at them as she checked them out.

"He's gets those too, huh?" Temari asked.

"Why yes, how'd you know?"

"I figured as much," Temari said with a smile.

"Here you go," she put the four books in a bag and handed them to Temari.

"Thank you." Temari headed out at a brisk walk back to her room. She looked down at the books in her bag.

"Why would he…" her eyes creased in thought.

--

Temari never saw Shikamaru the rest of that day. She thought she should be rather irked, but ended up being bummed out about it. She laid the books on a desk in her bedroom. She bit the tip of her thumb and placed her other hand on her hip as she stared down at them.

Over the next few days, Temari's routine consisted of scurrying back and forth between the main building full of the old and decrepit— and the academy full of the young and annoying. She knew Shikamaru was teaching there, but even when she admitted to herself that she was actually trying to find him, he somehow remained hidden from her.

It wasn't as if she needed his company. All she did this week was stay within the proximity of the main building. It seemed as though Shikamaru somehow knew this.

She couldn't exactly accuse him of being a bad guide if his presence wasn't a necessity. Even so, she couldn't help but feel that he was somehow avoiding her.

By the end of the week, Temari dully noted that she had not seen Shikamaru since he left her for her first meeting at the Hokage's.

She didn't like this at all. At first, she thought she would at least see him the day after he so kindly insisted on buying her lunch. Now five days had elapsed, and there was no sign of him. Chouji and Ino were constantly off on separate and joint missions, that she never got a word in edgewise before they were off again.

'What is going on with him…?' she thought quietly, sitting at a desk in the academy. Her fingers slowly intertwined each other as she stared right through a stack of papers under her nose.

Her concern and thoughts of him grew to such a degree, it actually began affecting her work. She couldn't believe it. All he had to do was be gone for awhile, and she was falling to pieces.

Temari sighed and ran a hand roughly through her hair. It just didn't add up…the dispersal of his scattered behavior—the kindness—the staring—the flinching…the chills…

She tried to ignore the last one, because that was on _her_ part, not his…(as far as she knew).

The growing fear and the longing just to know _where _he was grew to such a height, that she even reluctantly resorted to asking Izumo, Kotsu, and even Iruka-sensei of his whereabouts. Of course, she always pointed her motives toward needing to talk with him about reports and whatnot. They answered her politely and told her where and when they had seen him during academy hours. There wasn't a hint of suspicion, nervousness or uncertainty about her declared motives. This only bothered her more, because no matter when or where they said they saw him, she was never able to duplicate their actions and find him as well.

--

On a surprisingly cool, cloudless late afternoon, Temari sauntered down the main vein of Konoha's roads that split the city in two main segments. Her head was low as she looked onward and brushed at her bangs with her fingers.

'Something's wrong…something's definitely wrong…" she thought to herself.

The concern was turning to a cold, growing fear. She hated being fearful. It was something she rarely became, even in a near death situation. She didn't know how he did it, but Shikamaru could pull every dormant emotion out of her, almost easily—even fear, even…

Temari took a buckling misstep but collected herself quickly.

'Damn it! He can even make me _trip_!' she fumed in her mind. How he could do all this without even _being _there nearly made her knees give again.

She wondered what she should do. The need to talk with him over reports was a lie. The heavier assignments that required much communicating with all the instructors usually occurred later in the exam. If she wanted to ask the Hokage herself, she couldn't use that approach. At the same time, she didn't want to get Shikamaru in trouble by dually revealing that he was not with her most of the time. Although she thought him getting in trouble was unlikely to do the circumstances, she still didn't want to risk it. Now she felt like she was being forced in a corner. She felt she was coerced more than ever before.

She wanted to avoid this, but she decided with was the only way to find him and finally talk to him.

Temari stepped into a flat paddock of acreage surrounded by tall, green trees. The sound of the gently babbling creek was occasionally broken by the occasion clunk of the bamboo fountain. In the middle of the rocky plain, stood a large manor that connected directly to the forest. Temari approached what she assumed to be the front door and knocked.

A dark haired woman wearing a grime spotted apron opened the door. Temari smiled civilly and gave a slight bow.

"Good evening, Mrs. Nara. Um…is Shikamaru home?"

Temari noticed a slight twinge in Yoshino's eyes before she collected herself.

"Oh—I'm sorry…Shikamaru doesn't live here anymore…"

Temari blinked and her mouth slightly opened. She never expected that answer. Shikamaru lived here. He always lived here. What on earth was going on? A jarring rush came over her. It felt so strange that Shikamaru could not be called upon on a whim, like he so easily could before. He suddenly felt completely intangible. More and more, she realized she had to put work into finding him, all the way to coming to his house, which he now no longer lived in.

"Oh…I see. I'm sorry for bothering you. I didn't know."

"He should be coming here tomorrow though," Yoshino said easier, "he visits on the weekends, just like he said he would… You can come over if you like."

Temari tensed. "Oh! Thank you," she chortled out nervously, "I'll be very busy though, but I thank you for the offer." She took as deep an inconspicuous breath as she could manage. "Um…do you know where he lives?"

Yoshino stared at her with a blank face for a time. For a moment, it seemed like she was going to question her motives, or not answer the question at all. Temari's insides squirmed as she sensed this, even when Yoshino _did_ answer civilly.

"Yes, he lives just a mile down in the Midori apartment. Here, I'll write down his number for you…"

There was growing tension in the air around her. Temari watched her carefully as she grabbed for a pencil and notepad. It was obvious she was putting a tremendous effort into not looking suspicious. Temari grinned while the woman's head was still down. She appreciated the failed effort.

"Here," she tore out the paper and handed it to Temari with a calm smile.

"Thank you," Temari took the paper…and was rather shocked. She was expecting a phone number…not a room number.

"The mail is given at the front desk, if there's ever anything you need to get to him when he's not there," she informed.

"Th—thank you," Temari said more weakly than she wanted, still baffled at the number staring back at her. She didn't know why she felt so anxious knowing she now knew exactly where Shikamaru resided…there was nothing disturbing about that…

During the quiet pause Temari seemed enthralled by the piece of paper in her hand; Yoshino studied her carefully. You'd think Temari struck gold wrapped in diamonds, now that she had Shikamaru's room number in her hand.

"You're with him quite a bit, huh?" Yoshino asked, her head tilting somewhat.

Temari's eyes drew up slowly. She wondered if this woman was looking at her as the ambassador from Suna, or some man chaser after her newly fledged baby boy, Shikamaru.

"Well, not lately, no, I haven't seen much of him. That's why I finally came over here. I needed to discuss some of the scheduling with the instructors and talk with him over a few reports."

"Oh, okay, I see," Yoshino said near silence, her head nodding slightly, and her eyes looking downward. Her suddenly quiet demeanor was actually very discomforting. "How did you know he lived here?"

Temari did well not to squirm, and she managed. "He's showed me from a distance a few times."

"Hmm…" she murmured, her eyes flicking up to Temari before looking down again. "Has he always been your guide here?"

"Yes, since I was first selected as ambassador…" she was tempted to emphasis _ambassador_, but hoped the protective mommy would get the point.

"And he is this time as well?" again, her tone not much higher than a breath.

"Yes, I'm—pretty sure he's stuck with me." Temari hoped humor would help thaw this ridiculously trepid situation. However, Yoshino's expression suddenly smoothed over to complete blankness, and her body straightened slightly. Temari was at a loss. This woman was Shikamaru's _mother_?

"I think it's good for him," she spoke more dryly after a substantial pause, "Even though he is recently a Jounin, it remains an honor that he is privileged to be the guide for the Suna Ambassador. I hope he's doing his job to your satisfaction. He treats you quite well, I presume?"

Though the implication was ingeniously faint, Temari could sense that Yoshino was being oh so subtly invasive on this topic.

"To be honest, Mrs. Nara, no one treats me kinder than he does. I enjoy his company very much. He's not just my guide, I consider him a very good friend, and I respect him deeply as a very talented shinobi." She almost felt like she was explaining in defense to an attorney, not having a happy, easy conversation of how Shikamaru was such a good, dutiful ninja, and fed her often and got her treats, and treated her like a lady.

"Um, anyways, I have to get going," Temari said courteously, "Thank you for your time. If you don't mind, will you tell him I'm looking for him when he comes tomorrow? About the reports and such?"

"Of course," Yoshino nodded, as if completely unfazed by all that had just passed.

"Thank you," Temari bowed slightly and turned away. She heard the door shut behind her.

Temari walked on unhurried, and with a kind of purpose. It wasn't like she was trying to _impress _Shikamaru's mother, but she did want to portray herself as a dignified ambassador, because she seriously doubted she wasn't being watched at this moment.

Indeed, as her steps drew her further and further away from the house, she couldn't help but feel a pair of eyes, staring though a glazed window from the house. Temari thought it was wise to not turn around and confirm her suspicions, and simply walked onward, until she was completely off of the property.

'Well, that was a righteously awkward situation,' Temari thought harshly. Conversing and getting along with older adults individually was something she did with profession, and had little trouble with. However, whenever it came to _parents_…or parents that made it very known of their concern for their children, Temari could skillfully pull something out of the hat, but found it far more difficult. This was the most awkward experience to date. Although she was rather pleased with how she overall managed the situation, the distress in she felt internally was something she did not want to repeat again.

A quiet, restless memory gradually surfaced to her forethoughts. She remembered the specific segment in his apology that mentioned his parents, and his so-called ungratefulness to them…

Temari reluctantly recalled the sparse and sporadic moments she had with her parents. Her mother was very affectionate, but her time with her was paltry well before it was permanently cut short. She had zero fondness for her father, which in the end, made her feel bad, not only for him, but also for never having the chance to relish a father daughter relationship that was entirely alien to the former Kazekage.

Temari then recalled the numerous intriguing expressions on Yoshino's face during their subtly grilling conversation. Temari smiled a little. It _was_ admittedly cute, seeing his mother be so instinctively protective and watchful of what she still considered her baby boy.

Temari thought it was very sweet, and on a certain note, kind of annoying. It would be more understandable if he were some 16-year-old kid, years past puberty, but still in hormone driven prime.

Temari stopped dead in her tracks.

"Oh—damn…" she said out loud. She started laughing and put her hand on her head.

Shikamaru _was_ a 16-year-old kid. Despite how immature she had so often accused him of being, she often forgot how young he was, on account of so many notably mature attributes he undoubtedly had. He was actually younger than Gaara…sheesh.

Temari's hand slid down to her chin. Whether or not he was hormone driven was another question. She decided to put that subject matter behind her. 'Shikamaru' and 'hormones,' in the same sentence, made her wind up and tense for some reason.

Temari reentered what would normally be a busy main market place; however, anything towards the edges of villages was less crowded, especially near any of the forests. The lesser crowds here meant a quieter, more peaceful atmosphere.

Temari stopped. Her eyes were forward, though her head was tilted slightly downward. Her eyes peered over her right. She could see the Hokage's office, which stood in front of the embassy. That way was home. She could just call it a day, and return to her suite and file in reports at her desk for the exams.

Her eyes then flicked to her left. That was direction of Shikamaru's apartment. It was too far to see the building itself, but she knew it was down there.

Temari swallowed hard and tips of her fingers began to tingle. The sun was setting steadily, but it's rays would linger a long time after they set. It wasn't even near dinner yet.

She pondered deeply. Her eyes bore down the dirt road that grew less and less occupied by passerbys. Temari sighed.

"All right…" she breathed, turning to her left, and heading further from than she ever had from the main building.

Temari stopped short of the front entrance and casually examined it. The apartment was tall and neat with no signs of shoddy living standards. It wasn't the fanciest looking apartment in town, but it's not like it would end up in a magazine of Ghetto Architect.

Temari entered the double door entrance and looked over the site map. She memorized it quickly and headed to the 3rd floor. Down a wide hallway, not far from the elevator, Temari stood before a door like all others. She double checked the number on the note and looked to the number above the knocker.

"Better be in here, lazy bones," she growled to herself, firmly hitting her knuckles on the hard grain door.

No answer.

"Dammit, Shikamaru, what the hell?" she grabbed the handle— and it turned. Temari let go of it immediately as the door slightly creaked open from the momentum. Temari stared down at the slightly ajar door. So it was open was it…? He decided to leave it unlocked? Temari thought this just might be bad timing. What if he was in the shower? _Who showers hours before dinnertime?_ Maybe he's taking a whiz. _Okay, that's possible…_Now Temari wondered if she should take a chance. Should she just barge in a vain and hope that he isn't there and carelessly left his apartment unlocked? Temari knew it wasn't likely that Shikamaru would mind her being there, albeit a little shocked at first. Knowing him, he would just shrug it off and feel more guilty for _his_ absence, instead of demanding why she's there.

Even so…it would be rather awkward to get caught by him, snooping around his apartment.

Temari stared through the thin crack that she could see through. A constant waft of cool air gently drifted across her face. She could see a fan swinging silently in the middle of the room. The lights were out.

The sudden opening of another door in the same hall made her jump and take a breath.

"Oh, screw it!" she seethed, grabbing the doorknob and flinging the door open. She quickly closed it behind her.

--

**Authors Note:** Shikamaru really is younger than Gaara...yup.


	4. Chapter 4: What Counts Most

**Author's Note:** It has been SO long, I know! Forgive me. I just RECENTLY got a new computer, and then had NO time to finish the next chapter. But here it is, finally! This chapter is dedicated to my nuu grammer nawtsee freind, TaintedMoonlight. Because even after 19,000 words, she can still catch when I accidently spell 'here,' instead of 'her.' You deserve mounds and mounds of free, digital cookies you can't actually eat. Visit your local Naruto forum and browse the emocon menu for the delectable and always fat-free parcels of pixels. Mmmmm! Enjoy!

--

Chapter 4: What Counts Most

--

Temari leaned her back against the shut door, completely still. Whoever or whatever it was in the hallway that made her rash enough to officially trespass, didn't matter anymore. She was here now.

Sure, she could wait till the commotion in the hallway stopped, and waste every frantic breath and pattering heartbeat she got before lunging in here…but Temari shook her head at that. She'd come this far; might as well indulge her curiosity for what it was worth.

She stepped further into the dark room. All of the shades were pulled. Whatever light there was outside was not invited, and only seeped through the thin, revealing edges the blinds could not cover. Temari looked around carefully. It was cool in here, and very clean. She looked to her right down the hallway. Some of the doors were partially open and others closed, but none had any light source emitting from them.

"Guess he really isn't home…" she said glumly, "probably off training with his deers again."

She drew near the round dining table, noticing several documents and files. He'd been doing work, and plenty of it… more than most. It was like he had become the phantom ninja or something.

"Seriously Shikamaru, wh—"

_Click_

Temari spun around. There was no one in sight, but she suddenly felt overwhelmed with the weight of another's presence.

'Someone's here…' she thought rapidly, 'what the hell, someone's _definitely _here…'

There was the muffled sound of something shuffling; like something being dragged, or pushed. Temari knew it wasn't people in rooms above or below. It sounded like it was coming from the surrounding walls around her.

"Damn it…" she breathed, but she couldn't hide a guilty grin. "I'm gonna get it, I know it. You got this placed rigged or something, Shikamaru…?" she spoke to the open space around her.

The sounds began to fade, and slowly dissipated.

Temari didn't know what to think of it. She still faced the entrance door, not wanting to move. Her greatest fear now, was Shikamaru just waltzing in, finding a battle ready Temari when he stepped inside. She breathed slowly and remained still. She wanted to absolutely make sure the tension she felt completely subsided. Then…she would just leave. Forget trying to find him. She'd come back another time. This was insane.

Temari's eyes flicked around the room. Her body eased, and she stood straighter.

'Right, I'm outta here,' she thought breathlessly, forwardly striding to the door—

"You mean you're not gonna stay?"

Temari jolted so fiercely she nearly fell. She looked around. She expected him to have appeared behind her. She expected him to suddenly emerge from the hallway. But what had her absolutely stunned was that he was right in front of her, leaning against the wall, just next to the door.

'No…way…was he there the _WHOLE_ time!?' her thoughts thudded violently.

He emerged from the blurry shadows of the wall and approached her.

"Shika—maru…" she breathed, nearly panting, "what—the—hell!?"

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised to see you here," he said deeply. He walked past her slowly and headed over to the blinds.

Temari watched him as he passed. "You walk around the place with it this dark? Let me guess, vampire by night? Or are you going through an emo phase?"" she asked as the blood rush was cooling in her chest.

Shikamaru snickered, as he twisted the blinds slightly open, but not all the way. "Naw... it keeps the place cool during the day. The rays can get pretty intense, smacking right up against this building. I just moved in recently, and I'm saving up on cash, so I don't want to run the air conditioning constantly."

"Oh shame," Temari replied disdainfully, "And here I thought you lured girls in here by vanishing for several days, depriving them of your company, driving them mad with worry for your well being, forcing them to talk with your mother doe, and then sucking the life out of them when they're desperate enough to invade your house…. Silly me."

Shikamaru let out an embarrassed laugh and reached for the back of his head timidly.

"Hey…sorry about that. I've…been busy…"

"With what? Are you gonna tell me this time?"

He gritted his teeth.

"I know about as much as your friends do now," she said, raising a defensive finger to him. "Ino and Chouji told me about your crazy training— though your exceptional ninja skills allow your methods to be a mystery even to _them_. And then…" she became quiet, her fist lowering. Her stern expression slowly collapsed into sadness. "You…you visit Kurenai-sensei, huh?"

Again, Shikamaru said nothing. He looked out of the scarcely open blinds to an evening coming nearer.

"Yeah…" he said.

For a time, the two didn't say anything. Shikamaru watched, as the sun seemed to melt over the horizon, sending ghost-like heat waves rippling up its dimming body.

"Well…" Temari finally spoke. A small smile came over her. "If you promise you won't do it again, I'll completely forgive you."

"Of course," he replied, quickly. He turned his head to return a knowing smile, but then froze. Temari looked at him slowly as the rays of the sunset gently glided up her neck and across her face. The smooth edges of her bangs were highlighted by the setting light, also allowing him to see the blue and green collided in her eyes, all of which fiercely contrasted with the dangerous, beautiful, unknowingly sensual scowl on her face. Shikamaru stared dumbfounded.

Temari's expression smoothed over into slight confusion as her lips parted and her brows rose. When Shikamaru noticed this, he didn't look away— no, that would be too suspicious. Instead, he quickly turned to face her completely.

"Um…you want some tea or something?"

Temari gave a satisfied sigh. "Yes, please."

Shikamaru walked to his kitchen, forcing his eyes to not drift to her sun cached body.

While she was on her feet, Temari decided to browse the room more freely now that it was illuminated with natural light.

The room had a scent that relaxed her and made her want to breathe deep and sigh deep. The walls were an off white, and the floors were a smooth, light colored wood. Shikamaru had a few scrolls and tapestries mounted on the walls, probably pertaining to his clan. He even had an intricate, intimidating pair of curving antlers mounted above the fireplace. Temari studied the beautiful, yet frightful looking thing. The stag had to have at least been as big as a draft horse.

Her eyes trailed downward, and she noticed several pictures on its mantel. Even from her distance, she could see that they included all of his friends. Naruto made an effort to be in every single one.

She smiled, but before she could walk up and get a closer look, Shikamaru was at her side.

"Here," he said, handing her the tea.

"Thanks…"

Shikamaru wordlessly beckoned her over to the couch across the coffee table.

"Nice place you got here," she mused, sitting across from him. "Real open. I like that."

"Yeah, it's actually a two bedroom, but I turned it into a study."

"Hmm…I hear you do that in a freakish manner nowadays…"

Shikamaru swallowed and slowly lowered his cup to the table.

"Like I said, your former teammates clued me in a little about your recent routine. Of course, they didn't know any specific details, except that you've half killed yourself on more than one occasion."

"Is that all you guys did after I left? Talk about me?"

Temari shrugged.

"Well, you sort of left yourself wide open for gossip. But no, that's not _all _we talked about. I was simply updated on all the happenings of Konoha. Apparently, you're a major event."

He huffed through a grin. "I see," he replied calmly. He then slowly opened his eyes wider and grew slightly pale as if he was realizing something terrifying.

"Wait—did you say you went to see my mother?"

"Yes I did," she answered.

He was quiet for a moment.

"Oh…" Shikamaru bit his lip and his face cringed in genuine pity. "You poor woman…"

Temari lowered her head and laughed. Shikamaru shuffled and leaned forward.

" Sooo, how did it go…?"

Temari sighed and smiled at him. "She thought I was hunting down her precious baby fawn with my evil, hawk-like womanly clutches."

Shikamaru snorted and threw his head back. "Figures…" he eyed her again. "She didn't give you a real hard time, did she?"

"You know, it was a very, very unique and frightening experience that I wish to never ever experience again," Temari answered. "She was subtle in such a way that her suspicion sort of crawled inconspicuously up your body, but sank into your pores like damn anchors."

Shikamaru cringed. "I expected as much…sorry..."

"Oh, don't worry about it. I can imagine why her insides would tighten up at the sight of me." Temari waved at herself. "First, you move out. Then, not long after, here comes a gorgeous blonde foreigner—"

Shikamaru sucked in his tea vehemently and nearly spit out the scolding liquid.

"—knocking on her door, wanting to speak with her son…" Temari went on, "yeah…I imagine she was pretty rank about that."

Shikamaru had a hand over his mouth in a purposefully thoughtful pose, trying to hide his severely skewed mouth. He coughed and straightened up. Temari was eyeing him with sheer pretentiousness as he lowered his hand. She wondered if he would comment on her self-praising tidbit.

"You'd think she'd be use to it by now," Shikamaru said composedly, trying to act as if he didn't notice, "She loses all perspective on our respective jobs, just because you're a woman."

Aww, too bad. At any rate, Temari smiled. "Is she like that with every girl that comes knocking on your door?"

Shikamaru snorted. "I hope you're not assuming girls constantly come knocking on my door and ask for my company. If they have, then I certainly don't know about it, because I haven't been there for over a month."

"You mean the girls don't come flocking to your doorstep?" Temari teased.

Shikamaru pointed at his door. "Do you see any out there?" he asked plainly.

"Well, they're probably searching for this bat cave as we speak."

Shikamaru grinned, "Usually people don't come over unless they're invited, so I think that answers your question."

"_I _did…" Temari cooed, slowly crossing her legs.

Shikamaru froze, completely caught off guard. He raised his head and slowly breathed through his slightly gritted teeth, forcing his eyes away from her newly revealed legs.

"Yeah well—you're Temari…you're brazen and imposing and…" he turned his head defiantly and back tracked, "Besides…" he finally seemed to get a grip of himself. "You're also a friend, so it's more understandable. Those girls that have a crush on a guy over a distance wouldn't have a legitimate reason to be at my house. Plus, being the Ambassador doesn't hurt either…"

He then looked at her curiously.

"So what exactly did my mom say to you? I mean…of actual interest or importance. Spare me of her venomous small talk, please."

Temari tilted her head and flashed him her ardent grin. "She said you visit on the weekends. In fact, you should be heading there tomorrow if I'm not mistaken."

"Yeah…" he confided. "Wanna come?"

Temari's breath came out unevenly as she looked away. "No thanks. I've already had a good dose of your mom that'll last me till the next time I visit."

"Aw come on, it'll be different if I'm there," he reasoned.

"Yeah, it'll be worse," she said, "no doubt your mom is going to try and sit between us, as if we were intending to sit next to each other in the first place. She'll ask if I went to visit you after I talked to her. Then she'll mention how _dark _it was getting when I went to go see you. Then she'll wonder if we talked. Then she'll wonder what we talked about. Then she'll wonder how long we talked about it. And finally she'll ask if you treated me to dinner."

Shikamaru stared at her with a silent smile before leaning forward.

"Well, then I'd have to answer that last question with a yes. Come on…"

"What?"

"Let's go get something to eat."

"Shikamaru, I was kidding."

"Well, I'm hungry, and I imagine you are too. I'm too lazy to cook anything— so let's spend money."

Temari lightly laughed and stood up, stretching.

"I s'pose it's the least you could do for ditching me for a week."

"Oh damn, you caught on," Shikamaru droned, "I was hoping you'd just think I was being a nice guy." He walked over to get his jacket.

"Haven't I surprised you enough with how well I know you?" she asked, stepping towards the door.

"Guess I'm losing my touch…"

"Or maybe I'm just talented."

Shikamaru opened the door for her, and let her have the last word with a smug turn of his lips. Temari walked past with a big haughty grin and ardent stride. Shikamaru's eyes could not resist an unblinking scan of the figure eight that was her body, but he quickly snapped his gaze upward, and sucked in an uneven breath. He then took in a fuller amount of oxygen and adjusted his collar impulsively.

'Damn…' he breathed in his mind, a few beads of sweat already forming along his temples, 'get a damn hold of yourself…'

He wiped the sweat, locked the door and pocketed his keys.

"Let's go," he said, leading her down the hall.

They didn't go anywhere fancy. Neither of them were dressed for it. Not only that, but if by some chance they did get caught by anyone they knew, they would have a more valid excuse for the incident. This was a dinner meeting of course. Nothing more…

Temari finally got to have a pleasant stress free evening, with the very cause of her recent stress sitting right across from her. But she had long felt calm and relieved by his physical presence now. He somehow had that way with her, and it gave her unrelenting chills.

'Shit, this kid is a smooth operator…' she thought, her cheeks growing hot and red, thankfully hidden by the dim lighting.

Shikamaru had his entire face hidden by the menu.

--

Yoshino walked into her bedroom, with a yawning Shikaku emerging from a much-needed nap after a fearsome mission.

"Heard the door earlier…who was it?" he droned, stretching.

Yoshino was quiet at first. Shikaku rolled over in bed and outstretched his arm to her, fiddling his rough fingers with her dress. She smiled a little.

"It was that Suna woman…the one Shikamaru's assigned to escort all the time…"

"Mmm…" he mumbled.

"She was looking for Shikamaru…" Yoshino said quietly.

"Mmm…"

"She's pretty…has those kind of eyes men could stare at for hours…"

"Mmm…"

"She asked where he lived…"

"Mmm…"

Yoshino turned to Shikaku with her hands on her hips now. He looked at her.

"Mmm?"

"Shikaku…stop playing dumb," she warned.

"Sounds like you're worried about our boy…" he growled nonchalantly, stretching his muscular arms above his head again.

Yoshino spoke almost breathlessly, "Of course…can't you add it all up? First his habits change like night and day, then he's gone from the house all the time, then when he suddenly moves out, he still acts shady whenever he visits on the weekends, and now…" she pointed her hand in the direction of the front door as if she could see through the walls.

"Yes, I've added it up, but do they directly connect?" he looked at her. "I doubt that girl knew he moved out, otherwise she wouldn't have come here at all. Trust me, she wouldn't want to."

Yoshino frowned.

"Besides…she _is_ the ambassador of Suna. She has a mission."

"I know that, but…"

"Shikamaru is a good boy…I'm not worried about him." He sat up and looked at her, seriously. His face then suddenly twisted into a smile, like he couldn't help himself. "Though I must say, she has good taste in men."

"Shikaku! Don't you dare encourage him!"

"Don't worry about it, love…Shikamaru's grown up. His age just doesn't reflect that. We can't be invasive, especially about something this personal. Besides…" he eyed her curiously, "you make it sound like there's something between the two, even when the mission requires the two to be together."

"She was trying to hide her nervousness."

Shikaku's mouth twitched. Everyone was nervous around his wife. How this managed to be a shock to her, made him want to snort out a laugh, but he managed to hold it. Even _he_ had to tread lightly around her at times.

"Huh, I can't imagine why…" he mockingly put a hand to his chin, feigning deep thought.

Yoshino slapped him on the shoulder and walked out of the bedroom. Her feet echoed gently through the hall as she reached the living room. The sun cast a dimming, saturated orange through the tall gleaming windows. The sun had long since set, and night would be coming soon.

--

On a bright, cloudless afternoon, the scent of baking grass smoothly rustling in the gentle breeze was such a pleasant, immediate contrast to the walls of a cramped hospital room. Swift footsteps (despite a constantly burdening weight), strode across the packed down dirt road, in the direction of a large cluster of apartments.

"Pretty soon now, huh?" came a low, calm voice.

Kurenai looked up at a heavily knotted tree and spotted Shikamaru amongst the thick branches. She smiled at him.

"For one day, I thought you weren't going to visit me," she said as he jumped down to her side.

"I don't go back on my word. And I can sound cool saying that, unlike Naruto."

Kurenai laughed lightly and continued on. Shikamaru walked in stride beside her.

"So what did the doctor say?"

Kurenai took a slow, thoughtful breath. "Anytime now. He said after tomorrow, I have to stay at the hospital…" she lowered her head, "End of this week is the latest…"

Shikamaru stared onward in silence. Kurenai looked up at him and studied his face. She could only wonder of the thoughts that so easily cranked out of those gears in his head.

"Have you decided on a name for him yet?"

"I haven't really put a lot of thought into it. I feel like I want to see his face first, you know…" she lowered her gaze. "I'm sure something will come to me then."

Shikamaru tilted his head thoughtfully. He felt that there was a deep sincerity in that decision.

"Perhaps you can help me too?" she asked.

"Heh, yeah I'll think about one too."

The two were quiet for a time. Kurenai looked at him curiously. Although Shikamaru was in no way a busybody gossip, he normally talked at leisurely intervals and always had interesting quips of information and sometimes amusement. His stark silence, and the not too readable look on his face created a more noticeable ambiance than he intended. Kurenai decided to play it lightly, but obviously.

"You've been visiting later and later in the day for the past few weeks now…" there was no particular hint of suspicion or misgiving with her tone, but her subtle drone of words sent the hairs on the back of his neck shooting upward, and his shoulders flexing and rising in defense.

"You've been busy, huh?" she asked with the same, cool water tone.

Shikamaru inhaled through his nose, trying not to appear distressed, and he couldn't stand why he felt so put off guard, so on the spot, and so vulnerable to revealing inner thoughts.

"Uh…" he blurted, "yeah…"

"It's always that way with the exams, isn't it?"

"Uh….huh…" He looked forward and cleared his throat.

"Hmm, it seemed like yesterday that you and the other teams were trying for Chunnin. You were the least enthusiastic, the least motivated, and yet of all the talented entrants, you were the only one who passed the exam." She glanced at him. "Who was it that you were fighting again?"

"Erm…some girl from the Sound Vi—"

"No no, that was the preliminaries, I'm talking about the actual match, the one that gave you a challenge. The one that really prompted you and got you promoted."

Shikamaru's lips clamped together, his eyes narrowed, and his nose crinkled, but he managed to make all of those features disappear when he answered.

"That Sand kunoichi….Temari."

"Temari, _that_ was her name…" Kurenai verified. "Isn't she the one you hang out with since she goes back and forth between here and Suna?"

Shikamaru silently (somehow) cleared his throat.

"Yeah," he breathed tensely.

"Ah…" Kurenai mused. "…You two get along well I presume?"

Oh hell…

Shikamaru couldn't believe how difficult it was to maintain composure during this ravaging tirade of simple innocent questions. What kind of ninja was he to be spasing and twitching and choking up over questions that hardly had any specificity? Perhaps it was the curse of his over thinking brain. Perhaps it was the combination of that prodigious gift along with guiltiness of denying truer feelings to a very respectable teacher and friend. If it were anybody else asking these questions, he would have been able to answer them with the utmost composure…right?

"We get along pretty well…" he answered bluntly.

Kurenai looked at him. "That was a pretty long pause, Shikamaru," she said, this time, with an actual tone of playful suspicion, not a made up one.

Damn it all, there was a _pause_ while he was mulling over his own conscious guilt? What happened to sly responses that shot out of his mouth like a muscular reflex? What happened to thinking up densely complex and layered answers in less then a second?

"Sorry—kind of zoned out for a second. I know that's not normal for me, but I'm a little tired…"

There, that's better. Good recovery. Perhaps it was a plausible enough excuse to fool her, or perhaps his tone managed sincere slothfulness to make her want to move on.

Instead, a slight laugh came from her. "She keeps you on your toes, huh?"

Of course she didn't want to move on.

"That…among other things of course," his voice lolled.

Damn, this woman wasn't stupid. Asuma picked a smart one. Kurenai knew exactly what she was doing. And even though he already knew this, he was continuously spiraling down her worded vortex, completely helpless to every overtone, every undertone, every verbal psychosomatic trap, all because they were related to a certain Sand kunoichi…

"Such as…?"

No. Hell no. Shikamaru wanted to end this, and end it now. It was too risky. He could give something up. He could reveal something.

"I admire her. She's a great ninja…but she's damn ruthless, particularly in areas of life where she has complete control. Plus I have to keep my guard up, otherwise she looks to outsmart me every chance she gets. Never does…but yeah, she keeps me on my damn toes. They're bruised and feeble now."

Kurenai gave a soft chuckle. "I can see why she likes hanging out with you."

"What d'you mean?"

"Oh, that's not something for me to reveal to you. You need a girlfriend to gush over why you're so pleasant to be around."

Shikamaru's mouth flat lined and his eyes drooped lethargically.

" 'Not into the gushing types, sorry," he droned.

She sighed.

"Regardless, I have to say, Shikamaru, sometimes I'm tempted to say you need to get a girl— but then I remember that you're only 16, and I wonder if you're too young to romantically hassle with the female gender, or if your maturity overrides that aspect and makes you eligible for the challenge."

He became silent.

"We all know that there's no shortage of girls who want to get their hands on you, now don't we?"

Again, he was silent, but a knowing smile came over him as he walked on.

"Is there reason you're ignoring them? There're some awful pretty ones after you."

Shikamaru said nothing for a time. Before long though, he looked at her with a mellow smile.

"You know me, Kurenai-sensei…I just want one…I'd rather wait for _her_ than try and appease every high-heeled bimbo that squeaks and squeals whenever they become hollowly infatuated with the next male commodity."

Kurenai's eye brows skewed upward as she slowly turned her head in his direction.

"Is that right?"

Shikamaru walked on grimly as he suddenly felt self-conscious of his brusque, decisive answer. It came out quicker than he intended. Damn brain…he could've sworn it was working against him.

"It doesn't surprise you that much does it?" he went on, "I have no interest in being a living heartbreaker. It's the cruelest torture tactic. It might as well be in our training manuals."

Kurenai laughed quietly. "Sometimes you sound so much like Asuma…"

"Then I sounded like him before I met him," Shikamaru said, "I've had that mentality since I was a kid."

Kurenai smiled. "That's what has always been unusual about you. Your mind worked years ahead of its age. But at least you have noble tendencies…" She paused, and then looked at him.

"How will you know if she's the right one?" she asked genuinely, but still with a hint of playfulness.

"Asuma knew."

Kurenai jolted. Her smile drifted downward, and the sudden sting that pierced her, left her mouth agape.

"And _you_ knew…"

Now she turned away. Her eyes fluttered shut; they felt hot, as her body felt cold. The sting was most prominent under her eyes.

She had always enjoyed Shikamaru's company very much, but once in awhile, he could make the power of Asuma's absence cripple the fleeting moment of joy a friend could bring. That was the downside—the darkside of friendship. All feelings, all emotions are illuminated, more powerful; readily including the painful ones.

"Hey, I'm sorry," Shikamaru said, as if he knew where her thoughts had drifted.

"It's all right Shikamaru…" she took a deep breath and deftly wiped her hand over her entire face.

'This kid…' she thought as a bittersweet smile came over her.

Even with the discomforting stutter in the lighthearted conversation, Kurenai didn't want to suddenly abandon the topic just yet. Instead, she decided she was going to be just as guileless and blunt as he was.

"I'm still curious though...is there anybody in particular that's in your pursuit?"

Shikamaru's shoulders tensely rolled upward towards his ears. An involuntary twitch came from his upper lip, and he didn't say anything.

"There is, isn't there?"

Silence again.

Kurenai smiled calmly. "You're trying to be stone-faced again."

Still, he said nothing.

"I knew it… You're right Shikamaru, I _do_ know you well enough to know that you would have denied it soundly and confidently if it weren't true. But don't worry. I won't torment you with guessing games…but if you're going to hide it, try not to make it so obvious to other people."

"…"

***

It was another clear morning in Konoha, and Temari was casually, and rather mindlessly strolling down the human cluttered streets of one of the vendors.

As she wandered to no place in particular, she heard the distinct tone of an overly energetic, combative voice. Skirmishing with his, was a less familiar, but equally harsh bark of barely decipherable words. Temari turned her head to see Naruto and Kiba, apparently having a lively argument. She hadn't seen Naruto since her last visit, and decided it would be fun to listen in on their debate.

Neither of them took notice of her as they went on mocking each other, and that was just fine with her. It was more interesting this way.

"Well, then, why don't you ask Shikamaru for some tips, huh? I bet he could give you lessons with his eyes closed." Kiba barked.

"You reject, if he closed his eyes, he'd just fall asleep," Naruto snarled, "he's too damn lazy. Besides, I don't need _lessons_, I could—"

"Lessons for what?"

Both shinobi looked in Temari's direction.

"Oh hey Temari! Wow! I haven't seen you in like forever!" Naruto said happily.

" 'Picking up girls', lessons," Kiba answered, he then pointed accusingly at Naruto, "don't try escaping the subject just 'cause someone interrupted!"

"I wasn't changing the subject! It's called common courtesy, ever heard of it? Or did your owner forget to train you up on that?"

"I _was_ being courteous! I was answering her damn question!"

"Well, lesson number one, boys…" Temari intruded calmly, "don't argue like banshees in front of a lady."

Both of them stopped and looked at her while their arms were locked together in a tussle. Temari looked up at them.

"And what do you mean, 'picking up girls' lessons? Shikamaru isn't an oaf who goes around hounding women."

"True," Kiba said, shoving Naruto away, "but he's the most popular guy we know with zero effort on his part, so I figured Naruto could get a few pointers."

"Yeah, like _bathing_ regularly," Naruto jested.

"What are you talking about!? I bathe regularly!" Kiba shot back.

"Fine, then the tooth brushing could be improved upon."

The two were about to grapple again when Temari spoke up, sincerely intrigued.

"Shikamaru's popular with the girls?" she asked.

"Are you kidding me? The guy doesn't even try and the girls just _flock_ to him. At first, it was just the kunoichi that had it in for him, then I guess word got around, and for whatever reason, even the regular folk swoon at the sight of his friggin' shadow," Kiba yammered.

"Yeah, in the past couple years, Shikamaru's been the real lady killer around here," Naruto finished off, shutting his eyes tightly and crossing his arms.

"…Really?" Temari raised a brow.

"Yeah, 'specially lately. It's no fair," he pouted.

"That's funny…you know, he actually told me he never invites girls over to his place."

"I didn't say he did," Naruto said, "And he probably doesn't, but that doesn't mean they don't mob him in the streets," he went on, "They all ogle and gush over him, and he just looks at them like they put mustard on their cereal or something."

Temari smirked in amusement. Then her eyes wandered, and she inwardly chuckled at the idea of girls suddenly flanking a helpless Shikamaru while he was minding his own business. She could see it in her head:

First, there would be the initial shock and confusion from the sudden bombardment of females; then there would be the aggravation and disgust that they're all the same. That's one of the attributes she admired of him. He wasn't a girl chaser. He was patient and meticulous about _any_ choices he made, and this seemed to include women as well. So far, he hadn't even come close to even _pretending_ he was fond of any of them—

Temari suddenly opened her eyes and her mouth parted slightly.

_Except…_

Temari shook her head and placed a hand over her cringed brow.

"Hm? Hey, you all right, Temari?" Naruto asked.

"Yeah, um…fine," she breathed, shaking her head again, just slightly now. "I gotta go, see you later, guys." She walked away, fast and stiff, her arms swaying straight and mechanically at her sides.

"Huh…wonder what got into her?" the blonde boy asked.

"Probably got a headache from all your stupid screaming earlier," Kiba answered calmly.

Once they made eye contact again, Temari was completely forgotten and they started bickering and rough housing again.

Now that she was alone and out of sight from anyone she knew, Temari began to walk more briskly, her eyes searching for a familiar companion. If she wasn't going to find Shikamaru at their usual hang outs, then she would just have to wait till later and invade his house again. Temari smiled. She wouldn't mind that. When Temari looked up again, she saw Sakura walking towards her, seemingly dreading the company of a certain loudmouth blonde.

'Wait, what the hell?' Temari thought, baffled, 'I just saw him two minutes ago fighting with the dog guy.'

"Sakura," she called.

Sakura turned to the call, "Oh, hey Temari-san, haven't seen you in awhile," she said, jogging up to her.

"What's up, again!" said Naruto gleefully.

"Where the hell did you come from, I just saw you grappling with the mutt ninja. Are you trying to practice your theories on Sakura?"

Sakura looked at Temari curiously as Naruto began waving frantically and desperately putting a finger over his mouth.

"What theories?" she asked.

"Oh I'll let the kiddo explain it to you."

Sakura looked at him suspiciously. Naruto grinned and cowered at the same time.

"Anyways, have you guys seen Shikamaru?"

"Yeah, actually, he's was headed to the hospital last I saw him."

"The hospital…? When was that?"

"Oh…'bout ten minutes ago, why?"

"I…have to talk to him. How far's the hospital?"

"Only a few minutes from here, see that big building right there?"

"Yeah, thanks a lot. I'll see you guys later, okay?" Temari was off trying not to appear too hurried.

"Would it be wrong if I was suspicious?" asked a perturb faced Naruto.

"About what?"

"Aw, c'mon…_them_?" he pointed severely.

"You know," Sakura looked at him warningly. "I'd be careful if I were you. They're the last two I think you'd want to tease about anything. Oh, and what was Temari talking about? What were you going to _practice_ on me?"

Naruto's eyes widened like saucers.

***

Temari made it to the front of the hospital and took in its surroundings; taking note in memorizing it. She entered the double doors and casually clapped a hand on the front desk.

"Can I help you?" asked the older female attendant.

"Yes, has a Shikamaru Nara been through here?"

"Oh, I'm certain. He's here every day," she answered, gathering up a notebook.

"Visiting Kurenai-sensei, right?"

"That's right, dear—ah, here it is. He just signed in not fifteen minutes ago. I didn't see him leave, I'm sure he's still here. Room number 307, third floor. Here, sign your name."

Temari did so and flopped the pen back down on the paper. "Thank you," she said, making her way down the hall.

As she rounded several corners and passed dozens of doors, and rode up an elevator, she made her way down the last hall. She slowed significantly at the sight several hundred feet ahead of her. A single door was hanging open in the hallway. A blaring, yellow light streamed out of the doorway, illuminating that small sector. Temari supposed all of the curtains were pulled back full length to allow all the light in the world to shine in. For some reason, Temari knew instantly that that was the room Kurenai inhabited. Temari looked up at the panel above the door, and sure enough, it was the right number.

She slowly made her way to the fringes, but didn't walk in right away. She lingered. She listened. She wanted to know what they were talking about. She wanted to know what Shikamaru had to say to a pregnant widow, whose child he vowed to take care of.

Silence.

Temari brushed her bangs back and slowly turned inward to peek.

Kurenai was lying asleep on the hospital bed. She looked haggard and worn from what looked like an aged battle. Her tussled hair was partially damp, like it had been drenched with a bucket recently, and her face was moist, as if she had been swimming in her own sweat only hours ago.

Temari sucked in air and her eyes widened as she looked Kurenai over again, and noticed a very flat belly.

Temari instinctively shot out of view and leaned up against the wall in thought. She then heard the sound of mild shuffling, and a soft, low chuckle. Temari looked in again, but her eyes darted to the right this time, at the source of the cooing. There, she saw what made her heart quench for blood and oxygen, her head was in a whirl, and she stifled a gasp.

There, at the other end of room opposite of Kurenai, stood a little make shift crib, where an active, white clothed baby waved and kicked in play. Stooping over him was a tall, young, black haired man with intelligent, drooping eyes and a sly, crooked smile that somehow communicated vast lengths of gentleness, and even innocence.

His chuckles were more like proud growls, as he held a single large finger doting over the child's nose and eyebrows and cheeks. The baby waved and grasped and kicked with gleeful eyes. He coughed and giggled and sneezed every now and then, but was surprisingly active for being only half a day old.

Temari continued to watch, completely still. The front of her body was leaned flat up against the wall, her bangs crushed against her resting head, and her hand covering her mouth just slightly. She didn't understand what was happening. She wasn't even thinking about why she was reacting the way she was. All she knew was that she could not keep her eyes off what she was seeing. Her vision began to blur, as tears slowly welled up in her glistening eyes. In normal circumstance, she would shake her head, suck on her teeth and wipe away any evidence of tears. She was too strong for them. She never shed them. But now, she couldn't budge. Was this a good reason to cry?

_"Akatsuki…killed my sensei…_

…_she and Asuma-sensei were married…_

_and the worst part of it…Kurenai-sensei… is pregnant…_

_I'm going to take care of their child…"_

Yeah…it was a good reason to cry.

"What are you going to name him?"

Temari suddenly awoke from her stupor. She tilted her head to look at him. His head was up, and he was facing Kurenai. She must've waked.

"I don't know yet…" she breathed. "Maybe you should name him…"

Shikamaru lowered his head. "He's not my child. I'll be naming my own children."

Temari flinched.

"Huh…" Kurenai breathed with a slight smile that took great effort. Her eyes then drooped severely, and her head rested deeper into her pillow, and she fell into another round of sleep.

Shikamaru looked down at the crib again and returned his attention to the tiring, pudgy little newborn. The baby's large, expressive eyes began to take the shape of his mother's, as they slowly batted and eventually closed entirely.

Shikamaru slowly grabbed his blanket and laid it over him.

As he continued to fuss over his comfort, Temari turned and rested her back against the wall again. Her eyes stared numbly into space.

"So…are you gonna come in?"

Temari froze. Was he talking to her? Who else was here? How long did he know she was there?

Temari slowly poked her head in. Sure enough, Shikamaru was looking right at her. Temari's hands trembled for a moment before she closed her eyes and smiled. Without a word, she entered the room, almost carefully walking up to the crib.

"Come on, now, he's not gonna bite."

"Shut up," she said quietly with a guilty grin, before looking down at the sleeping baby. Her eyes softened immediately, and shimmered with moistness.

"Cute little guy, isn't he?" Shikamaru growled like a proud papa, grazing his fingers along the uneven tufts of powdery soft hair.

Temari's lips shut tightly, trying to suppress the urge to ogle and fuss over his gentleness. Her eyes then slowly trailed up Shikamaru's figure, focusing on the steady expression that was so earnestly centered on the dozing baby.

'He…he really is going to be a wonderful father some day…'

"Come on…" he suddenly whispered to Temari, the back hairs of her neck nearly jetting out as he breathed into her ear, "let's leave these two for now."

Temari only swallowed hard and wordlessly turned around, stiffly walking out of the room. The two walked silently down the hall, the broad soles of their shoes reverberated flatly against the walls, but loud enough to make the silence between them even more obvious.

"Shikamaru…" Temari's voice was gone, and she barely breathed his name, as her words were lost.

"Temari…" came his comforting growl, "wanna come over to my place—relax a little? You look kind of overworked."

Temari exhaled through her teeth with her eyes counting the tiles they stepped over, as they neared the exit of the hospital.

She deftly rubbed a hand up her arm. "Sure."

***


	5. Chapter 5: The Dream Far Apart

**Author's Note:** Boy was this a long haul. I apologize for the wait, AGAIN. It takes a lot of willpower to sit my butt down and type-- before of course, something like life comes up and postpones it. I was about ready to quit, even with a single paragraph to go. However, a few recently read reviews left me guilty enough to at least finish this chapter. I hope you enjoy it. As for the next installment, guh...I'll try not to let you guys down. If you see any glaring mistakes, feel free to PM me, I was tired. Very--_very_--tired...

--

--

**Chapter 5: The Dream Far Apart**

The walk to Shikamaru's home was silent, sober... hardly noticed by either. Both had their minds dreamily spiraling down a contagious whirl, mutely mulling over what had just taken place only seconds earlier. Neither looked at each other, but they were completely aware of each others presence. The journey felt surreal and absent. No matter what route they took, whether busy, bustled road, or still, puddle-riddled alleyway, it was as if the entire walk to his apartment was through a silent, soulless hospital hallway.

--

When they reached the infrastructure, Shikamaru unlocked the door without a word and ushered Temari inside. Temari drifted near the middle of the living room and impulsively arranged her fingers across her arm. She heard Shikamaru head to the kitchen, followed by the sound of clattering porcelain. She knew he was making tea. He didn't even bother asking. Temari simply walked over to the couch and draped herself over it. She tried to block out any complex thoughts that strived to steal her placid attempts at relaxation. She sighed and laid a hand on her forehead. Shikamaru watched her from afar. Both of them felt like they were in recovery-mode; instinctively easing the body back into a breathable, workable routine and function. Shikamaru smiled, as Temari didn't even seem to notice that she was dozing off. This relieved and calmed him a bit.

_Well_, he thought, _at least she's relaxed enough to feel comfortable napping here…_

When the tea was ready, Shikamaru quietly brought it over. Temari took a deep breath and stretched upward. She wasn't entirely asleep, and her eyes fluttered slightly.

"Hey…"

Temari murmured inaudibly before responding.

"Yeah?" she droned in reply, rolling her head in his direction.

"You know when I apologized to you in the desert?"

Temari slowly smiled with a hint of nostalgia shimmering in her eyes. It wasn't even an old memory, but it somehow retained a preciousness just like one. It was one of those memories that crept into her dreams, and could slowly bring her out of her sleep.

"Yes…what about it?" she asked, leaving only a little hint of her pleasure for the well fed reminiscence.

"Well…here's another one then." He sat up and folded his hands, leaning forward. Temari eyes followed his movement. She didn't know what to expect now.

"I want to thank you."

Her mouth parted slightly.

"What?"

"Yep Temari…I want to thank you."

She found that her legs shifted at the sound of her name coming out of his mouth.

"Why?"

"Well…" He turned his head toward the window, gazing out through the pane. There was a lone, drifting cloud, secluded and contrasted against the serenely blue sky; a nomadic wanderer, treading its own invisible, infinite path.

"Just…being here," he said, still staring at the lonely thing. He finally turned to her.

"I know I've never really said it, but I appreciate being able to hang out like this. I know I'm your guide and all, but I _know_ you've made some conscious decisions to spend time with me."

Temari turned away as her hands were gripping tighter in the fabric beneath her.

"I know I've been kind of apathetic about it in the past, but—it really does mean something to me."

Temari couldn't help but feel a sudden rush build in her chest and seep down her curved spine. Even things that _did_ mean something to him were hardly worth his verbal acknowledgment, and yet here he was, admitting to her that her mere company meant something to him.

Temari finally gathered the courage and looked back at him. She never thought she would need courage just to look his way. If it were anyone else, she would just smile and nod at the gesture and be done with it. But this was Shikamaru. This was tunneled into something much deeper than a surface laid out with gratitude. There was something more to this, and the knowledge of it made her stomach tighten.

"I'm glad it didn't go unnoticed," Temari said, her eyes partially closing, "though I want to be surprised that you're thanking me, at the same time…I'm not really."

Shikamaru took a breath through his nose and sipped at his tea.

"Now can _I_ say something?" she said.

Shikamaru raised a brow with a tugging smile. "Of course…"

She leveled her vision to meet directly with his, her eyes with a sudden brightness and clarity; her mouth softened to a sincere gentleness, and her overall demeanor radiated a tenderness he had never, in all the time he had spent with her, seen before.

"I…I greatly admire what you've done with the situation of your sensei's widow…and what you're going to do; so much so that— I can't even properly put it into words really…" she brushed at her bangs unconsciously, "when you told me what you were going to do while we were in the desert, I understood, and I was even in awe, but not to the degree that I am now…" She looked at him with a faint smile, "you've changed a bit…"

Shikamaru shrugged and ran a finger along the rim of his hot tea cup.

"Not really…" he quietly insisted.

Temari watched him. His strong hands slowly ran along different objects that happen to be laid out before him.

"What are your plans once they get out of the hospital?" she asked.

"Well…" he breathed, leaning back into the couch, "I'll still visit her every day, make sure she's all right. That will inevitably make me the most prominent male figure in his life. It's no doubt that I'm basically going to be his surrogate father. I won't hide it from him. I'm going to tell him how great his father was, and the powers and responsibilities he possesses as a Sarutobi."

Temari let her eyes drift down to the swirling, cloudy film that rose from her tea cup.

_Shikamaru's whole life…_ she thought.

His entire life had transformed into something that only seemed to have a likeness of his original self, but had otherwise abandoned him. From the freakish amounts of training, to the chasm of distance he created with his closest friends, to his unwavering dedication to his sensei's newly born son. His whole life had undergone a radical alteration that would leave an invisible scar along his heart line. Although his calm demeanor never faltered, and his mellow way of going about his habits, and his sincere dedication to his village and friends remained undaunted, Temari knew for sure now, that Shikamaru truly, would never be the same. And all of it was because of one thing. One incident. One single cause…

"I want to know."

Shikamaru looked at her. "Know what?"

"About that Akatsuki member…how you did it."

"…Did what?" he replied.

Temari carefully tilted her head and took a breath. Clearly, he was uncomfortable with the subject matter. But now seemed like no better time to finally get the answer.

"How you killed the one that killed your sensei."

Shikamaru slowly turned away with drooping eyes. He didn't exactly look sad or crestfallen, but a tire seemed to sweep over him. All at once though, he looked right at her, with a look on his face that seemed to tell her that he was actually thinking about revealing the carnage. More than that, it was almost as if he had been waiting to tell her, but at the right time.

"All right…I'll tell you," he said, sitting forward with his hands folded. "I mean, we're ninjas. We've got strong constitutions."

Temari half smiled. "This isn't exactly going to be a campfire story, is it?" she asked.

Shikamaru guiltily but cunningly bared his teeth. "No, definitely not."

He began right from the point where his team encountered the pair in the forest. He explained, like pieces on a shougi board, how the plan fell into place, and went into detail of the unusual powers their enemies possessed. He verbally sketched out every major move and every close call. Temari instinctively sat closer when he got to the part where he was alone with Hidan, and she especially gripped the cushion and held her breath when he elaborated on how he had tricked Hidan with his partner's blood sample. Temari's eyes were wide and her mouth was parted.

"That's pretty damn ingenious, Shikamaru...you're sitting right in front of me telling me this, and I still felt like you're gonna be a goner."

Shikamaru smiled and went on. He elaborated on how he triggered the trap that left Hidan hanging over a hundred foot deep abyss, and then of course, his one last tribute to his sensei.

Temari was quiet, replaying certain scenes in her head that particularly affected her. She then looked up at him, a soft smile forming on her lips before she began shaking her head.

"Only _you_ could kill someone with a cigarette."

Shikamaru smiled with a shrug and closed his eyes.

Strangely enough, this undoubtedly gruesome story seemed to lighten their spirits a bit. Of course it wasn't the story itself, but the re-lived victory and justice burning at the end of every word.

As further time began to pass, whatever dire mood was left, continued to alleviate, and their old selves began radiating through the hazy trance the hospital had snared them with. Temari still had a few questions to ask pertaining to his encounter with the Akatsuki, and wanted certain things cleared up.

"Let me get this straight one last time…you're telling me…" she threw her hands up as if measuring the situation, "you're telling me that Hidan is out there," she said, pointing out the window,"he's out there, buried in your own damn back yard, as we speak?"

"As we speak," he answered darkly."Wanna go unbury him and poke a stick in his eye?"

Temari started laughing, but stopped short and honestly hoped he was joking. Shikamaru smiled.

"Then when he starts cursing us profusely, we can stuff rotten tomatoes in his mouth," he suggested.

"You don't…he's not… still alive is he?" The idea absolutely mortified even her. Going to bed every night, knowing he's still in pieces underground; _alive_— and wanting out.

"He isn't," Shikamaru answered. "Whatever crazy powers he had, it wasn't really immortality. His body's blown to smithereens. Without any blood flow, he can't sustain life. His body will eventually rot in their individual pieces, till he's nothing but bones. Then the moisture and the sediment will erode the bones and replace them. If he ever gets unburied, all that will be known are fossils of what use to be…"

Temari's mouth skewed at his quick, sinisterly thoughtful answer.

"Wow…really made sure he'd never come back, huh?"

Shikamaru grinned, almost cynically, "I had it all planned out…" he said quietly.

Temari took a moment to study him again. She never really realized how often she spent her time just studying him, trying to figure him out. She could never seem to learn enough, and she never seemed to get tired of learning. Her eyes drifted over to the clock, and she sighed.

"You have to get going, huh?" he guessed.

"I've got a meeting in an hour. Forgot all about it."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be silly, it's not your fault," she said, getting up and stretching before deliberately peeking an eye open and smiling to reassure him.

"Want me to walk you home?" he asked.

"No. In fact—" she pointed at the hallway. "I want you to go to bed and sleep. You look like you haven't got any for days."

At the combination of the words, 'bed, tired, and sleep', Shikamaru did suddenly feel the energy drain from him. It was a bizarre phenomenon. He felt like he hadn't even _thought_ about it for days.

"All right, all right, I'll go to bed…" he stood up and took the tea cups to the kitchen. When he re-emerged, he noticed Temari standing before him with her hands on her hips.

"What?" he asked.

"I won't leave until I know you're in bed, and soundly asleep."

Shikamaru sighed and dropped his shoulders. To his account, she was being unusually concerned, but he could understand at this point. He really just didn't like being forced to do anything, which seemed completely ludicrous in this situation because Temari was actually _forcing_ him to get some _sleep._

'_Damn, this has been a weird trip to Konoha…_' she thought while rubbing her forehead. She looked at Shikamaru, who yawned and scratched himself idly. He seemed to be teasing her efforts.

Temari vigorously pointed down the hall again. Shikamaru countered her silence with his own, as he sauntered down the hallway and into his bedroom. He could hear her lighter pair of feet following his own. He couldn't help but notice the prickling down his neck knowing that she was following him to his bedroom. He stopped in the doorway and looked back at her strangely.

"Well?" she prodded with a rising brow.

"Um…I'm gonna change first."

"Fine, let me know when you're done, 'cause I'm gonna open this door again and I want to see you under those sheets with your eyes closed."

Shikamaru gave her a tight grin and shook his head. "Fine…" he breathed, closing the door, but not locking it.

Temari remained facing the door, her arms crossed, and the fingers on her right hand tapping her arm impatiently. She was ready to open the door the moment he said he was done so that she could be sure he would keep his word. Shikamaru on the other hand was casually taking his sweet time. Temari closed her eyes and twitched occasionally as the seconds passed. Suddenly, she was ripped away from any idle brain fog. As soon as she realized that she could actually hear him taking off his clothes, her arms snapped parallel to her sides and plastered against her body, uncontrollably squeezing herself. She fists clenched instantly, and she succumbed to a rabid heat rushing across her face. She instinctively turned her back to the door as if it would hinder her imagination, even though she obviously couldn't see through it. Her body only tightened at the self awareness of such silliness. She even closed her eyes, like it would aid in preventing the onslaught of heat triggered imaginings.

"All right," came a voice jolting her out of her stupor. Standing coma.

Temari slowly turned around, her arms red and vibrating uncontrollably.

"Are…you have clothes on, right," she stammered.

"No, I'm buck naked, Temari. Of _course_ I have clothes on. I wouldn't torture you with such a temptation."

Temari couldn't help a laugh, but her body shuddered violently at the glorious thought, her hands reeling, her eyes creasing and her teeth grinding. Temari seethed, feeling the volcano heat instantly spread from her face to the very tips of her toes. She knew her response was taking too long. Her nails shakily edged up her temple to brush away some invisible hairs, nervously awaiting a clever, snarky response from him, but nothing came. Temari turned to the door with all the speed of a sloth and stared. Needless to say, she was slightly put off by the silence. She somehow summoned the courage to keep her word and place her hand on the door knob. She took a breath. If she opened it too slowly, it would no doubt register a 'what the hell is wrong with you,' look on Shikamaru's face. So she summoned a heaping of willpower and opened the door casually, awaiting the teasing she would no doubt receive for taking so damn long to open a door. She opened it until her entire body could be seen through the doorway, and she stood. Temari's nose crinkled, her eyes drooped, and her shoulders dropped.

Shikamaru was asleep, just like that. It seemed that all he needed was a little prompting, a few seconds to register that he was in a resting position, and then years of conditioned lethargy would take over, shut his eyes and plummet him into a peaceful slumber.

So those were going to be his last words until she saw him later. Wonderful. What a perfect way end an encounter and enter into a meeting— with rabid thoughts of naked Shikamarus' running through her head. Or lounging casually with a sly, haughty grin on a fluffy mahogany colored, velvet textured, candle-lit couch—.

_Oh hell, stop, STOP!_ She frantically grabbed her head and darted.

After a single bound, she stopped short, and turned around. Before she simply booked it out of the premises, she had the sense and decency to gently shut his door. _Then_ she would run like a mad woman, and fly out of the apartment complex. She didn't even want to think about what she might be overcome by if she stayed any longer.

**--**

_The dream… _

_far apart…_

—_ripped, smoothed over—mended back together, falling raining, dripping through his curled, raw, shivering fingers. _

_It stops. _

_The rays of ambient light dry them before they hit the celestial floor._

_He saw her there. _

…_that fierce, beautiful thing with deadly curves and a wicked grin that enticed vicious desire. _

_The shadows danced over her body wrapping around her neck, dragging down her torso and snaking under her breasts. _

_He was jealous of those shadows. He would have them, so that he could have her._

_Chills glide down between his shoulder blades like a pair of clawed hands, raking down his spine, smoothing over his torso and gliding up his chest. He could feel her breath behind his ear. She teases—taunts his endeavors of self control._

_She wishes to awaken what she knows lies within him._

…_Nearly... touchable... locks of deeply golden strands, with only a subtle hint of curls that dimly shimmed when the sun rays stroked them. _

_ And she floats before him again. _

_The touchable friend._

_He glides his fingers down her soft, bare waist. She does not know how hungry he is. He hid it well. He hid it well for years. Now, his patience was dead, his lust threw off the corpse. His teeth reached for her throat. He wanted to dig his fingers into her. He wanted to roar and snarl and steal her breath with his mouth. He wanted to gnash and gnaw and draw blood… _

_but gently, gently he bit into her flesh. Gently he grazed his canines along her smooth throat. He could hear her breath quickening, quivering, quenched with exited fear. _

_Darkness. A black as night darkness wrapped itself around her, but she was not afraid. That darkness came from him. That darkness belonged to him._

_ --  
_

Shikamaru threw the covers off in a frenzy and nearly did a somersault in bed. When he came to, he was on his back, his vision dazed and desperate to come into focus. Eventually, the plain off-white ceiling became discernable. The ticking of his clock further reminded him of his whereabouts.

"What the _hell_ was that?" Shikamaru asked aloud. He slapped a hand over his face and rubbed it fiercely before letting his arm fall back down to the bed. "It was like a drunken poet vomited in my dreams or something…"

He sat up and snorted like a weary stallion and quietly took in the quiet atmosphere of his room. His eyes scanned around, sincerely hoping he really _was_ in his room, and not a Jiraiya-affiliated bathhouse. He sighed, inwardly thankful and looked at the clock.

_8:30… a.m.? _"Must've slept through the rest of yesterday and woke up this morning…" he murmured, throwing his legs over the side of the bed before stretching and yawning. He headed to the bathroom to take a shower, forcing an apathetic mindset in every preparation he made before turning the water on, but it was useless. Regardless of the stone faced look on him, his mind was wound tight around the shapely figure of a certain hot headed woman. Yes, regardless of the look on his face, the rest of his body was honest and true in their sentiments. Shikamaru didn't even have to look down to be aware of the nature of his lower extremities.

"Troublesome…" came out the long neglected expression.

--

For the next two days, Temari's recent routines had mostly consisted of stalemate deskwork and going back and forth between adjoining buildings— so a guide was not needed here. She had not seen Shikamaru since her leave from his apartment, and she was just fine with that. A periodic absence meant less distraction…although… a long absence meant a growing longing for that distraction again. Temari shook her head. She was going to remain focused. She was going to keep her head on straight. Good, time was passing. The more time elapsed, the more her imagination eroded a certain finger twitching, lip licking memory…at least that's suppose to be the logical explanation. Temari soon realized that the importance, meaningfulness, and dearness played a role in the lifespan, and quality of life of a memory. She looked out the window. The sun was giving off its last broad pulses of life as it slowly sank behind the silhouetted mountainside. Temari looked over at the clock. It was past five. She had been here all day. Temari closed the book before her and gathered up her documents. She arrived at the Hokage's office to deliver them.

"Where's your guide?" Tsunade asked, as Shizune took the folders and laid them over the desk.

"He's not here, but please, don't punish him," she joked lightly, "I've been in the next building most of the day, so I didn't ask for him," she explained.

"Is he doing an adequate job?" Tsunade asked, opening the folding and skimming the first page.

Temari intended to speak, but the words seemed to roll up in a tight knot in her throat. She coughed and cleared her breathing before going on neutrally.

"He's doing a very good job, as usual," she answered.

Tsunade didn't look up, and didn't say a word, as she flipped to the next page. Temari's eyes flicked to Shizune in the awkward silence. Shizune could only give her a sympathetic glance as she knew she waited for dismissal.

"How is he?" Tsunade asked suddenly.

Temari swallowed, and her hand instinctively shot up to brush away a nonexistent hair, but she recoiled and clamped both hands together.

"Ma'am?" was all she could manage.

Tsunade looked up at her. "How is he doing? Mentally. Physically. Emotionally. Is he doing better? I assume you know what I'm talking about?"

Temari lowered her head slightly.

"He's doing much better, yes. I've been informed of the current circumstances surrounding him."

Tsunade began writing on the given document.

"I've noticed a remarkable improvement in his overall demeanor since your arrival."

Temari took a breath. "He…needed someone to talk to."

"His teammates weren't sufficient?"

"Well…I suppose since they were involved in the matter, it was easier speaking with someone from the outside. Someone he could explain the situation to."

Tsunade was quiet again. She sat straighter and closed the document, folding her hands on top of it.

"Thank you," she said, her eyes falling on the young kunoichi.

Temari didn't know what to say.

"Thank you for taking care of him. That's what you've been doing, whether intentionally or not. You are just as much a guide to him, as he is to you, just in a different way."

Temari remained motionless.

"No one has been able to get him out of his slump, and you come and do that even before you arrive here, and it is very much appreciated. You've brought our genius back to us."

Now Temari allowed her hand to rise up and nervously itch her cheek.

"I'm glad I could help out."

"You're dismissed."

Temari bowed slightly and exited the room. As soon as she shut the door behind her, she slammed her back in exhaustion against the wall.

_Shit, that was taxing on my nerves…_ Temari thought, pulling herself off the wall and walking down a flight of stairs to the first floor. She burst through the double doors and took in the fresh evening air. It was Friday, it was night, and she was hungry. Not to mention a tad antsy for some obvious reasons, and it didn't help that her rump grew numb from sitting static, before standing static, before the Hokage of all people.

The pleasant mixture of smells from the marketplace drifted in small wisps and she inhaled deeply. If this had been the first time in this village, she knew she wouldn't starve. She followed her senses and became a part of the crowd. She took a few food samples from long winded food stand operators here and there, and she felt she could finally relax, but she kept her eyes open for a place she could just lounge and fill up her appetite.

It was at this moment that she spotted a black-haired, juvenile Jounin, strolling around the area as mindlessly as she was. Temari inhaled unevenly and shrugged unconsciously as a smirk came over her. Well…there he was—the cause of all emotional lashings within her.

Shikamaru hadn't seen her yet. Temari began walking a few steps forward when both she and him stopped at the shrill sound of someone shrieking his name. Shikamaru turned around with gritted teeth. It was happening. And it was happening right in front of Temari.

The bombardment of bimbos.

"Hmm…what to do, what to do," Temari mockingly pondered to herself, "should I turn on my haunches and boohoo all the way home?" she turned back to the reluctantly swarmed Shikamaru, "or should I have a little fun with this?"

Shikamaru had a severe scowl as the girls continued to crowd and gurgle over him.

"I don't think I need to ask," Temari breathed, making her way to the crowd.

Just before Shikamaru reached the peak of his exasperation, he heard the clear, husky voice of woman that cut through the whiney, bleating voices of high-pitched fangirls.

"Hey, Shikamaru…" Temari said, as if trying to entice him. She didn't know it would work so well.

"Temari…"

The girls went temporarily silent when they heard him say a name. They all noticed the direction his eyes were looking, and turned their heads in unison. Without even thinking of their presence, Shikamaru gently moved through them, instinctive in not bustling over them, and walked right up to Temari.

Temari stared at him with a bewildered smile. She almost wanted to laugh. She thought wholeheartedly that Shikamaru was going to charge up to her, panting in a panic, and tell they must escape before its too late. However, he did something completely different. He eagerly walked to her with a content grin, as if the incident with the competitive women didn't even happen.

"You wanna grab a bite to eat?" she asked, deciding to play along with him.

"Sure," he said, still enthralled by her sudden appearance, "let's go."

He instinctively touched her arm to move forward, but was still aware enough to draw back as they walked down the broad gravel road. Temari prevented a flinch, and merely took mental note of this, as she walked on as if she didn't notice. She was more interested in the dumbfounded looks on the faces of the girls as they stood rooted, comprehending the situation. Temari up and stole their man away from them. The sand kunoichi looked over her shoulder right at them, parting a wicked grin and laughing eyes.

Shikamaru walked on, seemingly unaware. Temari was rather uncertain of his lack of attentiveness in this brief, bizarre battle, but she shrugged it off as they rounded a corner and disappeared from the girls' views.

"Did—did that just happen?" one girl asked.

"Maybe he likes foreign girls…" another queried.

"That jerk! He just ditched us for that violent she-thing!"

As Shikamaru and Temari made their way to a cluster of upcoming restaurants, Shikamaru finally spoke.

"Thanks," he said bluntly.

"Oh, so you _did_ notice that I came to your rescue?" Temari teased. "I knew you were being weirdly clueless about the whole thing."

"Of course—I had to make them think that way. If I just rushed over to you and ran, that would indicate my acknowledging of their presence, but by acting like they were as numerous as the rest of the crowd, and ignoring their existence, it's a lot more affective. It really tells them that I just don't see them. Most of them won't be bothering me again. They'll think it's a waste of time."

Temari blinked. "Why, you always surprise me with how well you think ahead. It's pretty amazing. How is it they won't be bothering you again? I heard there's always girls scoping you out— right in your face," she grinned.

"Yeah, but they're almost always different girls."

Temari's eyes widened. "Really? Wow, aren't you the stud muffin?"

Shikamaru bared his teeth in a reluctant smirk and his cheeks reddened. Temari waited and wondered if he would deny it, but he didn't.

"So…any of them catch your eye yet?"

His smirk turned into a dark frown. It was a while before he answered.

"They're annoying as hell."

"Half of them are a lot older than me," Temari remarked.

"Yeah, that too."

"Why did this start happening all of a sudden?" she asked through a contained laugh.

"I don't know, but it's not exactly sudden…been happening more and more over the years," Shikamaru growled. "I s'pose when I started looking more like a man than a kid. They just come raiding my space all of a sudden with their slutty gropes and fake eye lashes."

Temari laughed and felt an insatiable urge to pinch his cheeks playfully, but she composed herself.

"You've got it rough, huh?"

"Tell me about it," he answered, playing into her sarcasm. Shikamaru paused and looked at her cautiously when he felt her put a hand on his shoulder.

"Why don't we go to this place?" Temari pointed suddenly at a low lit restaurant with smooth, enticing smells.

"All right," he agreed.

Once they were seated and made their orders, Shikamaru laid his head back against the booth and sighed.

"Sleep well after I left?" Temari asked.

Shikamaru's eyes flickered The first thing that came to his mind, was that damnable multi-colored, overly saturated dream. Oh, and the multiple dancing clones of a single woman that sat before him.

"Erm," he choked, "actually, I slept very soundly. Thanks for putting me to bed…"

An awkward silence.

"I didn't see you yesterday," he said.

"I was at the Hokage building most of the day. I didn't want to disturb you."

"Did you miss me?" Shikamaru asked cunningly.

"Did you miss _me_?"

"I asked first," he asserted.

"Okay, yes, I miss these moments," Temari said more quickly than she intended, fiddling with her napkin deftly.

Shikamaru lifted his head. He wasn't exactly expecting an answer like that.

"I mean…it sure beats desk work. And I'm sure you appreciate a night away from the howlers."

Shikamaru diverted his eyes and smiled before slowly looking up at her more seriously. He wasn't exactly sure how to break this question, and now seemed a good a time as any; at least while his courage held up.

"Temari…"

"Yes?" she looked to him curiously.

Shikamaru looked absolutely grim. His mouth was tightly shut, his eyes were narrowed and staring into space, and Temari thought she could see the faint beading of sweat gathering at his temples. Apparently, whatever he was going to ask, it had been on his mind a long time.

"Have you…ever…erm…" His nose wrinkled severely. He was having a miserable time trying to keep himself composed. Never had he struggled like this. He had the village's greatest poker face. And if he decided to wear Shino's sunglasses, he'd have the _world's_ greatest poker face.

At the moment however, he didn't look like he could play a hand of Go Fish.

Temari faced him with more focus now. She was both bothered and intrigued by his sudden tank in poise.

"What is it…?" she asked almost carefully. He looked ready to fall to pieces, and over what, Temari was anxious to know now.

_Damn it…I can't…control myself…_ he strained in his thoughts. _I can't back away now though. It'll only make things more suspicious. It looks like I trapped myself…idiot…_

"Have you ever…had a…significant other?" his throat closed up after that, as if it were a one shot deal.

Temari stared at him. "A boyfriend?"

"Uh...ye--erm...one of those..."

_No…__way he acted that goofy because of that question, there's just no…_

Temari thought fast on how to deal with this situation. Indeed the impulsive reaction would be to flaunt and tease, relish in making him blush and squirm and bite his lip. But she was afraid it would divert the conversation too much. She continued to think. If she answered his question, chances were he would pursue the conversation, and dig deeper. Sure, it left the possibility of her having to answer more questions, but it would reveal more about him that she had been wanting to know a long time. She was reluctant, and she fought hard internally, but she would push away the urge to tease for now, in search for his answers.

Temari lowered her head and smiled slightly.

"Well…no actually." Though her head remained low, her eyes darted upward quickly. She wanted to see his reaction. She wanted to see what she would expect from him. There it was. The relaxing of the shoulders, the loosening of the jaw; his whole posture seemed to melt slightly in his seat.

"Oh…" came a deep grunt from him.

_Dammit, __dammit, what is __wrong with me?_ he ground his teeth and sat straighter.

"Really?" he asked, taking casual breath and putting on a slight smile. Inwardly, he was thrilled, but he kept himself collected.

"Yeah, really," she droned, smiling at him. "Surprised?"

The corner of his mouth tugged upward. "I find you to be a pleasant mystery sometimes," he answered, "you seem too prideful to allow some guy, regardless of looks to just invade your sphere. You're not an airhead like Ino and Sakura. However, I don't know much of how you were before you came to Konoha the first time. So…it was hard to judge."

"Hmm…" she hummed, "You do a lot with the little information that's given to you."

"That's my job."

Temari glided a finger over her glass while studying him.

"What about you?" she asked.

"Naw, I've never had a boyfriend. Don't ever plan on getting one."

Temari laughed. "You know what I mean. Ever had any girlfriends?"

Shikamaru seemed more disturbed by this question than Temari did. He turned his head away slightly and his lip instinctively curled. He looked terribly annoyed.

"No," he answered flatly.

"You know, I imagined myself asking you that question one day, and every time, I imagined you being a totally cool cat about it. Just shrugging it off, saying no, or maybe even a "tsh" and a roll of the eyes, but…you look damn peeved."

"It's 'cause the girls that _have_ asked, are a bunch of squealing, half witted bimbos. It's like Ino times 10."

Temari snickered. "Oh, gosh, that must be pretty insane then?" Temari was glad she didn't jump to teasing him when he first asked her about a boyfriend. This was far more interesting. However, she decided she could get answers, and make him squirm at the same time. That was always satisfying to her.

"Okay, so you've never had a girlfriend, but…have you ever uh…" she lifted her eyes to him, almost seductively. Shikamaru tensed. He didn't even want to take a guess. He swallowed hard.

Temari twirled her fingers.

"Have you ever…you know…"

"Know _what_?" he asked rather loudly, in shock. Temari's eyes lowered. Her mouth relaxed, and she looked more serious now, as she truly pondered over the question. Of course, she would still be blunt about it.

"Ever slept with a girl?" she said quietly, her eyes creeping up to his eyes.

Shikamaru frowned, darkly now. This wasn't mere annoyance. He was upset.

"I suppose it's quite common nowadays for people to randomly sleep with each other without really being significantly involved," he growled, "but for the record, no, I've never laid my hands on some girl who wanted a one night stand, aka, those girls you saw before we came here."

Temari turned her head. A smile graced her lips.

"You?" he asked dully. He flinched afterward.

"Of course not…"

"Figures…"

"What do you mean?" she asked, her eyes narrowing.

"You're too fearsome and proud to let some random asshole get his mitts on you."

"Humph…and I say you're too noble to let some attention whore get her slutty hands on you and turn you into a slobbering wolf. As if the world doesn't have enough of those already."

"Makes us two of a kind, huh?"

"So it would seem."

The waiter came about during their brief silence and laid their orders on the table.

They ate mostly in silence, periodically eying one another. Although it was never verbally exchanged, both were well aware that they were ritually committing to the habit of analyzing one another.

When Temari was finished, she gave a content sigh and noticed Shikamaru opening up his wallet.

"You're paying again?"

"Always."

"That also part of your job description?"

Shikamaru smiled.

"More like a personal duty." He said laying down the bill, before getting up and offering her his hand. Temari looked at it a moment. Shikamaru watched her carefully. The shy hesitation, the shortened breath, the rapidly wandering eyes, it was all there, if only for a mere second, before she grabbed his hand quickly to prevent him from seeing any sign of it trembling.

"I'm going to walk you home," he seemed to read her questioning mind. he told her as they walked out of the restaurant.

"You…you don't really have to."

"I know."

Temari looked up at him. She was reminded of his height again, and took a moment to scan his entire body. It might have appeared unwholesome to a passerby, but now, nobody was in the vicinity they were traveling in. Because of this, Temari didn't mind admiring him and smiling. Shikamaru was either completely oblivious, or he was doing a fine job of pretending not to notice. Temari didn't care either way at this point. The two walked side by side through the crowd that grew less and less dense with people. The chatter and clamor of shops began to die away

The diversity of moods they could share with eachother; from teasing and taunting to reluctantly and nervously seducing, to calm, and deeply meaningful. And she could share it all with him, he was the only one she could share that kind of emotional range with. He made present, certain emotions and feelings she didn't know existed, until the way his eyes met her at times.

Temari found herself doing the very same thing he was doing to her not too long ago. Was this part of his plan? It seemed like she was recycling the very movements he was genuinely guilty of that day. That day especially. He studied her the most that day. Then he disappeared for awhile, probably to study some more on his own. Temari nearly stopped dead in her tracks, but didn't want to draw any attention to herself, so she continued on with the result looking like a half stumble. Shikamaru noticed. The very thing she didn't want.

"You all right?"

"…" Temari turned away, mindlessly dragging her fingers through her hair. She tightly shut her eyes in a hard, time consuming blink before opening them gingerly. She regretted not answering him, and waited for that mellow hail of verbal teasing, but it never came. It seemed that Shikamaru wouldn't press her on the issue. Temari felt relived yet slightly guilty.

It was fully night, now. The stars were thrown with careless beauty across the sky…but neither was paying any attention to them. Shikamaru chose to let whatever ailed her to discomfort her more. If it was important enough, he trusted she would bring it up again. Although this would normally turn into a dangerous habit if committed by other men, Shikamaru wouldn't carelessly toss it away. No, he would carefully stow the incident in his nearly infinite memory space and let it make friends with the other reminisces he had been carefully fostering. But what was the purpose if he was never going to bring it up again? Why give the memory any kind of nourishment? It wasn't the physical incident that

Perhaps it was his way of trying to pry something from her. Perhaps he could have his go at silently taunting, teasing and driving her down the same boulevard of insanity she so easily steered him in. She could push him. He wanted to see if he could push back. She could back him into a wall with no offensive maneuvers on his part. She could push him as if his hands were tied behind his back. But now, he wanted to see what would happen if he broke those ties... if he laid those hands on …

Shikamaru sighed as he discreetly eyed her. When would he ever be able to obtain that courage that looked so good within the realms of fantasy? He lowered his head. He would plan. He would find a way. Somehow, he would time things right.

He rested a thumb and forefinger on his chin. He had to be patient. He had to wait for an opening, and that wasn't going to be too hard given the tendencies of her nature. It was him. He had to take that opportunity. Somehow he would feel the perfect moment in the very air around him.

For now, he decided to relish in the fact that they were sharing the mutual tension and discomfort. At least he knew he was causing her mutual discomfort. They would have to share that a little while longer. Just a little longer. Finally, they stood before the embassy. The streets were barren and carved out of any souls. The lights of all but major buildings were dim or completely out. They stood for a few seconds. He had yet to hear her footsteps head toward the double doors. He expected her to say something. He expected himself to say something. He ground his nails into the back of his head. He couldn't even turn her way.

Now…? _Now?_ He lowered his head and closed his eyes, seemingly letting out a tired sigh. Was the opportunity there? He couldn't tell, he wasn't even looking at her.

_Damn it, damn it, seconds are ticking by, and I'm letting them die in vain…_

It was late. They were tired. Perhaps… tomorrow. Yes, he would try tomorrow. Shikamaru felt a tremor of guilt and shame drag like sand paper down his spine. After all this time, he was postponing the courage. After all this time, he was going the cowards way. What happened to all that he had learned during the time of her absence? Could the mere thought of attempting to initiate further closeness sever that valor and newness of life he gained from his recent tragedies?

_Tomorrow…._ He thought rigidly, trying to reassure himself. _Tomorrow for sure. I'm going to be with her anyway. It can wait one more day…_

He sighed again and dropped his shoulders.

_I just hope I don't make a habit of saying that…I could go insa—_

His thoughts were violently ripped from their roots. A hand, no, two hands had done the deed. Shikamaru's head was in a minor daze before his vision focused and he looked down to see Temari's flushed face.

Suddenly, she was all hands; all claws. She grabbed his vest, grabbed his shoulder, grabbed his collar and finally grabbed his head, and practically tackled him as she roughly planted her lips on…his crimson cheek.

That was it.

His cheek.

Nothing more.

She released him just as quickly as she had grabbed him and turned away, walking casually to the embassy, as if nothing had ever happened.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she said, lifting a hand without even turning to look at him. She used that hand to open one of the double doors. Just before she walked inside, she took one look around at him.

"Oh… and try to get some sleep tonight, okay?"

Shikamaru hadn't moved a muscle, his eyes hadn't blinked, and his mouth was dry from hanging open.

"Goodnight…Shikamaru…" the door slowly closed behind her, as she disappeared behind the shadows he so wished to control at that very moment. But he remained frozen. His hands were trembling. His feet were made of stone.

_Well…that made things a hell of a lot easier…_

_Damn... I love this woman…_

--

As soon as she realized she was out of his vision, Temari dug her heels in and ran to her suite. She burst through the door, slammed it shut and crashed her back into it, sliding to the floor.

If anyone thought she was in control of the situation; if anyone thought she had Shikamaru wrapped around her finger, they wouldn't be able to recognize Temari right now. Her knees were trembling against one another, her fingers were clawing the sides of her head, her hair was draping carelessly down her moist face, her teeth were grinding severely, and her eyes were crushed together. She was in anything but in a state of control. She wanted him. She wanted him right then and there. She wanted to drop him to the floor and inhale his breath as oxygen.

How she managed to follow through with her plan, and so casually retreat from his side like she was in control of the world, was a miracle she could not comprehend.

She only knew one thing now. She was weakened. She was vulnerable. She knew this changed everything. She knew the next time she saw him, she would want him more. She would want to feel his lips on her cheek, on her neck, on her lips.

As time passed, Temari's trembling eased, but it remained consistent, relentless, and occasionally flared back up to its original state. She could not stop it. Her breath was never sufficient enough, and her thoughts, never tame enough. Her mind replayed the events; replayed her decision... She saw what she had done to him. If only he could see what he was doing to her right now. Temari leaned her back further into the door, lifting her head to the room's cool air, and steadying her lungs intake of it. Eventually, her heart began to settle in the stillness, her breathing became slower, fuller. Temari opened her eyes slowly. Her vision seemed to open to a layer of memories, old and new, stretched over the plain ceiling. She took another steady breath, and watched as they danced before her.

He changed a bit...and...so did she. He changed her. They always had hidden retaliations. They always had subtle challenges. They always had mute study sessions of each other. And always... _always _he nonchalantly handed her defeat. He always turned around her momentum, claimed it as his, and turned it from a fierce, fiery tycoon, to a slow, soothing ripple through the air that mellowed her from the inside out. He was always one step ahead. He always beat her. He always won.

Temari's hands found company in each other as their fingers intertwined. Even with the adrenaline still surging; excitement still shooting through her veins, and the new weakness, the new vulnerability tearing through the sand hardened exterior; even with the still trembling hands, the sweat clinged hair, and fibrillating heart, Temari could not resist a simple, staggered, knowing grin that twitched along her face.

_I was finally one step ahead of you..._

_--_

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**Author's note:** have you ever had one of those dreams? Scary as all hell. Yes, typos and nonsense were in that particular section on purpose.


End file.
